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Thanks to People, as usual, for this collection of celebrity quotes.

“I was basically in the fetal position, basically in hysterics.”
Paris Hilton, on her first sleepless nights in jail

“I think my height intimidates people … When I tower under people, it’s horrible.”
– The 5’2″ Paula Abdul, on her new Bravo reality show Hey Paula

Carter Reum, Wife

“I think people see the cliché of the rock star. We’re supposed to get married every three years… trade in, trade out. I don’t dare say ‘trade up.’ I made a good deal the first time. If Angelina Jolie came in today, I wouldn’t trade.”
– Jon Bon Jovi, on his successful 18-year marriage to wife Dorothea

“Who else died? My career after coming to Australia.”
– ER star John Stamos, after appearing on an Australian talk show in an apparent altered state, later blamed on being jet lagged.

“It was the morning after I’d spent some time with a few of the girls and I was lying in my bed, and I went, ‘I want to be a Spice Girl.’ And then I went ‘Oh my God, I AM a Spice Girl!'”
Geri Halliwell, on when she realized she wanted to reunite with her Spice Girls band mates

“My head is going to be so huge … Now I may or may not wear pants for my takes with Steve from now on. I want to give him something special to think about.”
– John Krasinski, on being told that his costar on The Office, Steve Carell, discussed his “hotness” to People

“I’m not sure when or why the tabloid angle on me was decided that I am a cad. I’d have much rather it had been that I am secretly a dentist or that I love soup.”
– Zach Braff, addressing rumors of his reported womanizing on his blog

“We want to do a remake of Duets.”
– Paul Rudd, on the next project he would like to tackle with frequent costar Seth Rogen, to GQ

“I’ll be Huey Lewis.”
Knocked Up star Steh Rogen, on his preferred role, should that opportunity to remake a film ever arise

“I feel much better now and am delighted to announce that Brad and Angelina may choose to adopt my appendix and give it a loving home.”
– Alleged comedian and talk show host Jimmy Kimmel, after returning to work following emergency appendectomy surgery last week