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The View is in need of a new, overweight, opinionated host.

First, there was Star Jones. But she was fired for being really, really obnoxious.

Next, the ABC talk show called on Rosie O’Donnell. But she won’t be returning to a contract dispute that wasn’t helped by her accusation that America blew up the Twin Towers.

Roseanne Is Alive

So now Barbara Walters, Elisabeth Hasselbeck and Joy Behar need a fresh, plump co-host to fill the role of controversy-maker.

Enter Roseanne Barr. No, seriously.

Despite having not been in the celebrity gossip spotlight in a decade, the former sitcom star is somehow the leading candidate to replace Rosie. Also in the running – but far too thin, we assume – are Joan Rivers, Whoopi Goldberg, Kathy Griffin and Kathie Lee Gifford.

Yes, evidently “more annoying than Perez Hilton” is also a qualification to host The View.

We’ll keep you updated about this pressing situation. In the meantime, Kate Bosworth continues to pack on the pounds in an effort to be considered for the job.