Last night on the season premiere of The City, Whitney Port was greeted by old friend Roxy Olin, who she tried to help find a job at People's Revolution. Meanwhile, at Elle, Olivia Palermo clashed big-time with new boss Erin Kaplan.
Below, our staff reviews the first episode of the new iteration of MTV's Whitney-centric Hills spinoff, awarding and deducting points as we deem appropriate ...
In the opening intro, Whitney reflects that nothing is the same as when she first moved to New York. In other words, MTV revamped the whole thing. Minus 2.
Roxy Olin makes her grand entrance two seconds in. Peeps are sure to mention her first and last names whenever they reference her. Solid marketing. Plus 3.
Whitney lives in the West Village now. Even, since both that area and Gramercy Park are quite trendy. Just pointing out that EVERYTHING is SO different now.
Olivia Palermo was apparently retained, and got a job at Elle magazine. Erin Kaplan is introduced as her boss. She's a tough cookie! Must. Create. Conflict. Minus 1.
Erin and her boss discuss how they're going to "break" Olivia and knock this "social" off her high horse. We're holding out hope for full-on hazing. Plus 6.
Whitney and Roxy meet for lunch and talk about how great it is to be single. Roxy reminds us a little of Stephanie Pratt. That's not a compliment. Minus 8.
Roxy may have been onto something when she bashed Whitney's fashion sense. Whit's outfit on the roof is heinous. Plus 1 in any case, though, because she's just so cute talking about how she doesn't want to annoy the neighbors.
"Do your job," Olivia instructs Erin, having been at Elle herself for like a day. Minus 3 for her pompousness, and Minus 2 more for The City casting another Erin right after Whitney's friend Erin Lucas got axed for being dull. Confusing!
Kelly tells Whitney Port that she hopes her friends are worth it and treat her as nicely as she treats them. Words to live by from sage Mrs. Cutrone. Plus 7.
Five guys and 30 girls at Roxy's party ... What's the opposite of a sausage-fest? Plus 3 for the girl who complained about this, but Minus 5 for the neighbor who called the cops on a pretty tame gathering. How lame is Whitney's building?
TOTAL: -1. Not the worst we've ever seen by far, but The City 2.0 still needs to step it up and decide what the heck it is before it becomes a must-see.