I always used to feel bad for the women who lived in the Playboy Mansion.
I mean, sure, they probably got a lot of nice stuff while there, but the idea of living in a house with a herd of your doppelgangers charged with taking turns pleasuring your Viagra-pumped, geriatric boyfriend just never appealed to me.
Luckily, Kendra Wilkinson found a way to deal with some of the more unpleasant aspects of being one of Hugh Hefner's live-in "girlfriends."
In a clip for this week's Kocktails With Khloe, the former volunteer love slave pours a long, tall, cool drink of DUH and confesses that she was never really there for love.
"I wasn't there for romantic reasons and for marital reasons, uh, like Holly [Madison] was," she revealed before chuckling heartily at the shade she just threw at her former housemate.
"I had a great time," she added.
When guest Pauly Shore asked if she would ever get her freak on with guys at the Mansion, she swore she never did.
"I swear on my two kids — I never hooked up with one person in the mansion while being with Hef," she said. "I have that much respect."
"I would go to hotels down the street," she added, then shrieked with laughter, because OMG, SO SNEAKY!!!
"At least she's honest, though, don't you love her for that?" chimed in host Khloe Kardashian as the male guests shook their heads.
Maybe I'm missing the scandal here.
Hef's got a house full of big-boobied blondes to serve his every whim and yet one of them skipping out to have a little side fun of her own raises an eyebrow?
I just assumed such a thing would be standard — news that would hardly knock Hef off his gold-plated rocker.
After all, these ladies are bunnies. Why wouldn't they hump like them?