Michelle McGee

We all know that text messages can sometimes be hilarious. Like when they're sent by mom.

Or if the the characters on Game of Thrones ever learned how to text.

Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, the tattooed, fame-seeking floozy who broke up Jesse James' marriage to Sandra Bullock in 2010, apparently starred in a sex tape.

Shocking, we know.

Michelle "Bombshell" McGee says Kat Von D really shouldn't have expected anything less than being cheated on by Jesse James repeatedly. Hey, she would know.

Just hours after Kat claimed James cheated on her with 19 women, McGee said she warned Von D days after her engagement that the relationship wouldn't last.

Michelle McGee is back, and she's dropping some bombshells on Jesse James and Kat Von D.

The face-tattooed woman who slept with James during his marriage to Sandra Bullock told a New Zealand radio station this week that she knew the moment her relationship with the biker was over: when he cried over Bullock's speech at the Oscars.

Home wrecking legend Michelle "Bombshell" McGee is living the dream. She's got a hot tattoo on her forehead and a new boyfriend in Luke Urek.

He's from Australia.

Jesse James is engaged to Kat Von D. This came as a bit of a surprise, as he's been divorced for only about half a year. But we wish them the best. Seriously.

His former mistress Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, though? She's just interested in clinging to whatever's left of her 15 minutes. Mere seconds, hopefully.

Bombshell McGee may not have enjoyed herself in Las Vegas this week with Charlie Sheen, but a witness tells TMZ the actor was in heaven at The Palms Hotel and Casino.

Detailing a penthouse full of "big booby blonde girls fighting for his attention," this source got a look at Sheen's suite and said: "It looked like porn star auditions... the girls were all over him and he just sat back and took it all in."

Little is known about what went on inside Charlie Sheen's penthouse at The Palms this week.

But hilarious reports really do confirm that Michelle "Bombshell" McGee was one of the women that stopped by late into the actor's drunken Vegas binge. Yes, that Michelle "Bombshell" McGee!

Given his history of drug use and shady sex, it would take a serious bombshell to surprise us when it comes to Charlie Sheen news.

Enter Michelle McGee!

Where would THG be without good cheating scandals? Sure, these women are trashy beyond belief, but boy do they keep things interesting with their sexting, locking themselves in closets, making up sex tape rumors and such.

We despise them. And applaud their efforts. Below are THG's esteemed finalists for the Rachel Uchitel Award as the top celebrity mistress of 2010 ...

Notorious mistress Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, a.k.a. the tattooed girl who broke up Sandra Bullock's marriage to Jesse James, is still doing her thing. Whatever that is.

Here's the gross McGee at the Melbourne Sexpo in Australia last weekend, where she posed with elves, pole danced and made friends with terrifying phallic creatures.

Michelle "Bombshell" McGee is still around, and looking for attention any way she can get it, talking about Sandra Bullock and Jesse James dating Kat Von D.

Look, Michelle. Go away. Even THG is tired of you at this point.

Michelle "Bombshell" McGee is still talking. She's still sounding inane and trying to get attention. If you're still interested, read on and hear what she said.

Jesse James' mistress is defending recently unearthed photos of herself wearing Nazi regalia, saying "I don't believe it's racism at all. Anti-Semitism? Yes."

She's already the poster child for infidelity. Why shouldn't Michelle "Bombshell" McGee make money off that image and help sell ... extramarital affairs?

The original Jesse James mistress has struck a lucrative deal to promote a website dedicated to people having affairs ... and she will be plugging naked.

Some people may have seen Jesse James' tearful interview on Nightline and been impressed at how he bared his soul, maybe even feeling a little sorry for him.

Michelle McGee is definitely not one of them.

The Michelle McGee PR tour continues.

Relentlessly milking her infamous status as Jesse James' mistress for every cent it's worth, "Bombshell" is featured in the new issue of Steppin' Out magazine.

Who knew there even was a Team Bombshell?

NOTE: There really isn't. There's just a bra by that name modeled by Victoria's Secret beauties. Sandra Bullock fans can officially come down off the ledge now.

Michelle "Bombshell" McGee said earlier this week that she has lots of colored friends. Might she have had an affair with a certain "Cablinasian" fella as well?

You know what they say. Why stop at one celebrity home-wrecking sex scandal? Bombshell McGee is now hinting that she may have slept with Tiger Woods.

Two Jesse James mistresses in a boxing ring? We'd pay to see that!

Actually, no way would be pay money to see that. But we'd totally write about it the morning after and ridicule both of the trashy, hopefully bloodied individuals.

You see the cliched, wildly overused and ineffective "I have black friends" card played every so often by someone trying to diffuse allegations of racism.

The "I have colored friends card"? That's once in a generation.

Kat Von D says you shouldn't have beef with Michelle "Bombshell" McGee.

Well, not because of her tattoos at least. You can hate her for being an adulterer, fame-seeking sellout and overall waste of space, but lay off the tats.