Amber Portwood: I'm Not Going to Prison AND I'm Getting My Son Back!
by Emily Trainham at . Updated at .So hey, you know how Amber Portwood is an awful person who has done awful things?
Of course you remember, and if you don't, then we'll get into a recap shortly.
Sometimes being an awful person who does awful things means that you get arrested and have to go to court, and sometimes you can even go to prison.
So will Amber go to prison for her most recent awful act, the assault on Andrew Glennon from back in July?
Let's talk about it ...
1. A Look Back
It's been a wild few months for Amber Portwood, huh?
2. Oh, OK
Because she's the worst, that's why.
3. The Incident
She's the worst for a lot of reasons, but today we're mostly going to be talking about that time that she was arrested for assaulting Andrew Glennon back in July because they couldn't make it to see some ding dang fireworks.
4. So Awful
According to Andrew's story, she went off when there was roadwork that kept them from getting to a fireworks display. They went home, Andrew took baby James for a ride, then a few hours later they came back home again, and Amber was STILL MAD.
5. Insanity
She beat him with a shoe, threatened to kill herself, took a handful of pills that she regurgitated when Andrew tried to call 911, then ended the night by grabbing a machete and chasing him around the house, all while he was holding the baby.
6. Good
After she was arrested, she was charged with three felonies -- but there was still a whole, whole lot more to come out.
