Quoted Tom Brady: 'Cheating Is Ridiculous.' Relax, Gisele—He's 37042

By no means am I sitting here getting plays and getting defenses and checking plays based on defenses that I’m getting. That’s completely absurd. If that was the case, I think that’s just ridiculous. You know, I hear other players, based on what I’ve heard on television, that ‘Brady’s getting defenses.’ I’m saying, ‘That’s just ridiculous.’

–New England Patriots’ quarterback Tom Brady, proving he’s as articulate when talking about football as he is when awkwardly trying to explain why he dumped preggers ex-girlfriend Bridget Moynahan in favor of non-preggers supermodel Gisele Bundchen. [ASL]