The ‘Tick-Tock Photo Diary Contest’ Publicist’s Definition Of A ‘Slow News Day’ Is Very, Very Different Than Ours

Three days after the Virginia Tech massacre, fifteen hours since NBC’s controversial decision to air the campus shooter’s multimedia manifesto, and in the wake of the Supreme Court’s stunning 5-4 decision to uphold the federal Partial-Birth Abortion Ban Act, the following email missive was received in our inbox:

Slow news day?

Here???s a chance to let your readers know about an amazing contest! Fans can get creative with their favorite midnight fantasy and send a photo entry that best conveys the experience to a panel of experts. Judges will select the top photos, which will be featured on the Britney Spears Beauty website. The ten winners will receive a 30-gigabyte video iPod autographed by Britney Spears.

Note to the publicist for the Tick-Tock Photo Diary Contest:

1) Today is, most certainly, not a “slow news day.”
2) There will never be a news day slow enough for us to advocate a contest wherein readers send in their “favorite midnight fantasy” in the hopes of winning an iPod autographed by Britney Spears.
3) That is all.