Based on the direction of their careers and their outward appearances, it likely comes as a shock to many readers that Mila Kunis and Macaulay Culkin were once a romantic item.
We don't mean to be rude here, just factual.
Here is a recent photo of Kunis:
And here is a recent photo of Culkin:
But it's true:
Not only did Kunis and Culkin date... they dated for almost eight years between 2002 and 2010!
That's not even the craziest part of their story, however.
Are you ready to react like Culkin splashing aftershave all over his face for the first time as a young boy? Okay, here we go...
... Culkin is actually the one who dumped Kunis!
So it's very safe to assume, at least, based on an interview Kunis just gave on Dax Shepard's Armchair Expert podcast.
"I had a horrible breakup. I had a horrible, horrible, horrible breakup," she said about Culkin, adding in more vague detail:
"I f-cked up. I was an asshole in my 20s and I'll be the first to admit it.
"And that's kinda something that took me a long time to come out and be like, 'Yeah, you know what, I was a dick,' and accept it and I own it."
Ummm... what the heck did you do, Mila?
"It's f-cked up what I did. It's f-cked up what I did, and it's f-cked up how I did it," the actress continued, sadly leaving us to wonder what the giant mistake actually could have been.
It had to have been that she cheated, right?
And maybe that she cheated with someone very close to Culkin?
In the couple's bedroom or something?
Sorry, but our minds are racing over here at the possibilities.
"It's been however many years now, I think everybody's in a much better place," Kunis eventually said, prior to pivoting to her marriage to Ashton Kutcher.
The couple is one of the more stable and private in Hollywood, parents to a pair of kids (Wyatt and Dimitri) who we don't see very much of.
Before getting with Kutcher, though, it sounds like maybe Mila got with... a lot of other men?
"When I got to be single I said, I just need to figure myself out. I genuinely need to know why I did what I did and, like, regroup myself as a human," she said, continuing:
"So I just did that and, subsequently, after 6pm was open for business."
We're not sure what she means by that phrase. But we can sort of guess.
"I didn't want to date, I didn't want to be taken out to the movies," Mila said, again making us think she just hooked up with guys during this phase and then went home.
Which is totally understandable.
Finally, though, she cozied up to Kutcher, who she had known since their time as co-stars on That 70s Show.
After sleeping with him, the star says she "spent the night at somebody's house" for the first time in two years.
And Kunis ends this tale on a funny note, explaining on the podcast that her mon reactes as follows when she said she was actually dating Kutcher:
"She literally was like, 'Shut the f-ck up' in Russian."