If you caught Vanderpump Rules Season 3 Episode 13 last night, then you know the week's major fireworks came not from one of the regular cast members, but from the heavily botoxed mystery woman known primarily as "Miami Girl."
Annemarie Kunkel traveled from the Sunshine State to SoCal just to
get her 15 minutes of fame confront Tom Sandoval about cheating on Ariana Madix during a recent vacation.
The scene promised to be bigger than the moment when we'd finally find out if Jax Taylor is gay (still waiting on closure for that, BTW).
Sadly, when Annemarie finally confronted Tom (at work!) it was just more he said, she said nonsense followed by the slightly unstable Kunkel's retreat back to the land of the Florida Woman.
Fortunately, this is the Internet Age we live in and Kunkel is intent on making the most of her time in the spotlight by continuing to provide more details about her sexual encounter with Sandoval.
The more she talks about it, the more it sounds like the kind of one-night stand she'd just want to forget about, but hey...Tom's famous (kinda) so she'll happily spend the rest of her life telling the world about his 4-inch wang, and the fact that he gets kinda aggressive during sex (although that could've just been the drugs talking):
"I sat next to Tom, and he says, 'I'm kind of out of it. I took Molly," Kunkel says of that fateful night. "I looked at the floor and there was a bag of Mollies that he'd dropped. I said, 'Oh my God, you've dropped your Mollies.'"
So things got off to a seriously romantic start, and Sandoval was clearly laying on the charm in a big way. From there, it all got even more magical:
"In the fist five minutes of meeting Jax he told us that he was coked up out of his mind and was freaking out because he needed to find more coke."
So far, it's basically the plot of The Notebook with a little Casablanca mixed in, but Annemarie's tale is just getting started. Prepare yourself for a night of passion:
"He kept putting his hand down my pants. I told him I didn't want to have sex because I was on my period. He didn't believe me and told me to prove it. He flipped out and got this crazy, scary look in his eyes."
"Then he said he didn't care and we went back to his room and had sex. It lasted like three seconds, so I was just like, 'Thank God.'"
After a night like that how could you not track the guy down 3,000 miles away?
Watch Vanderpump Rules online for more insane people doing insane things to one another.