Sean Avery
Gossip

In the NHL, you get five-minutes in the penalty box for fighting, two for high-sticking, and thrown off your team for lewd comments about Elisha Cuthbert.

What a great league.

Just 23 games into his four-year, $15.5 million contract, the Dallas Stars say they cannot move forward with loudmouth winger Sean Avery. He will no longer play for the Stars once his six-game suspension by the NHL is completed.

Avery was suspended after he referred to Elisha Cuthbert as his sloppy seconds at an impromptu press conference last month. The actress is now dating Dion Phaneuf of the Calgary Flames, who were set to face off with Dallas that evening.

SORRY, DION PHANEUF: Thanks to Sean Avery's now-infamous comments, when it comes to Elisha Cuthbert, there's no doubt who got there first.

The team will look to help him move on (whatever that means) with his career and his life, co-general manager Brett Hull said. The fact they are willing to risk that loss illustrates just how much of a jackass Avery is viewed as.

In other news, NHL games continue to air on Vs. That's a TV network.

Notorious hockey motormouth and off-ice "player" Sean Avery's suspension has been officially set at six games by NHL commissioner Gary Bettman.

The Dallas Stars forward already served two games since he was indefinitely banned Tuesday for calling Elisha Cuthbert his sloppy seconds, in what the league called "inappropriate public comments, not pertaining to the game."

Bettman's ruling was announced on the NHL website Friday, one day after a three-hour hearing was held regarding the issue at the league's Manhattan office.

Avery used the crude but still somewhat funny expression in Calgary, Alberta, while speaking to reporters to describe his former girlfriend, Cuthbert, who is now dating another hockey player, the Flames defenseman Dion Phaneuf.

He later apologized without mentioning either by name.

NOT A "SLOPPY" DRESSER: With nothing to do for his team's next six games, the Dallas Stars' Sean Avery is free to indulge in his other passion: fashion.

Suspended by the NHL for making an offensive statement referring to his ex-girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert as sloppy seconds, Sean Avery has apologized.

"I should not have made those comments and I recognize that they were inappropriate," the hockey star said. "It was a bad attempt to build excitement for the game, but I am now acutely aware of how hurtful my actions were."

"I caused unnecessary embarrassment to my peers as well as people I have been close with in the past. As many of you know, I like to mix things up on and off the ice from time to time, but understand that this time I took it too far."

The NHL commissioner summoned Avery, who plays for the Dallas Stars, for a hearing Thursday on his indefinite suspension for making what the commissioner called "inappropriate public comments, not pertaining to the game."

Although he didn't mention Elisha Cuthbert by name, the actress now dates Calgary Flames defenseman Dion Phaneuf. With the Stars about to battle the Flames, Avery referenced one of his opponents taking his "sloppy seconds."

No word on when Sean Avery will be reinstated.

The NHL sucks.

We apologize to its 12 fans, but don't even try defending this logic (it's even sillier than putting hockey franchises in Arizona, Texas and Florida):

The league allows fights - serious, punch-the-hell-out-of-the-other-guy fights - with only five-minute penalties assessed to the participants.

But call your opponent's girlfriend your "sloppy seconds," well, don't even think about that! The NHL draws the line there. Enjoy your next strike, morons.

Yes, the NHL suspended one of its most notorious players, Sean Avery of the Dallas Stars, for talking trash to the new player dating his ex-girlfriend.

His ex, of course, is actress of Elisha Cuthbert.

Elisha Cuthbert used to date Sean Avery. And be kind of famous.

Cuthbert's new boyfriend, Dion Phaneuf, plays for the Calgary Flames - and during a practice session in Calgary this week, Sean Avery said the following:

"I just want to comment on how it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds," he told the media.

"I don't know what that's about. Enjoy the game tonight."

Avery is suspended indefinitely pending a hearing with NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman. Elisha Cuthbert and Dion Phaneuf have not commented.

Looks like hockey player and big-time Hollywood playa Sean Avery is looking to branch out a little - the New York Rangers left wing will for some reason be serving as guest editor at Men's Vogue in just a few short weeks.

In an online diary for the site, Sean Avery gets shirtless in the Vogue closet and dishes about his unlikely passion for fashion:

"To me it's simple: I am a douche like clothes. Always have. I don't watch sports. I don't read about sports ... Over breakfast in hotels when the Rangers are on the road, I read the Style section in The New York Times."

Sean Avery is stepping into the celebrity fashion world as Vogue guest editor.

Avery, who was romantically linked to another fashion train wreck maven in Mary-Kate Olsen late last year, has also dated myriad other celebrities.

Among them, the alleged actresses Elisha Cuthbert and Lake Bell - who he supposedly cheated on Mary-Kate with. Yeah. Dude is not un-shady.

While Ashley Olsen and Lance Armstrong seem to be going strong, twin sister Mary-Kate Olsen had better watch her back with her new athletic star squeeze.

According to the New York Post, New York Rangers hockey standout Sean Avery, who met Mary-Kate Olsen through a mutual pal, Bungalow 8 owner Amy Sacco, is two-timing Mary-Kate and seeing his ex-flame, Lake Bell, behind her back!

Sean Avery (right) sure is pumped up after scoring... with Lake Bell!

What will Mary-Kate Olsen think when she hears this news? Who knows. But there are plenty of other NHL players chasing celebrity tail if she's interested.

Sean Avery is not exactly known for his gentlemanly ways, of course. New York Post sources say after he split with Elisha Cuthbert, Sean Avery went around telling people he dumped The Girl Next Door star, not the other way around.

Forget about Tony Romo, Matt Leinart and Tom Brady for a second.

Lost in the NFL quarterbacks' quest to dominate celebrity gossip headlines are the efforts of more than a few past and present NHL stars to slip one between the pads (if you know what we mean!) of certain celebrities.

While few NHL players match Romo or Brady's notoriety - more people have already read this post than watched last year's Stanley Cup Finals - more than a few hockey stars have scored - and skated on thin ice - with Hollywood's finest. Below, we separate the bottom-feeders from the true players ...

HIT THE SHOWERS

José Theodore. The Colorado Avalanche netminder partied with Paris in 2006 while girlfriend Stéphanie Cloutier was pregnant. You'd think a goalie, of all people, would be able to fend off such a brutal attack. Here's hoping he at least used protection... and we don't mean his 30 pounds of hockey equipment.

A FULL HOUSE ... OF KIDS

Valeri Bure. Full House star Dave Coulier introduced Bure to his Canadian co-star cutie, Candace Cameron, in 1996. The rest (marriage, three kids) is history.

Wayne Gretzky. How can we leave off the legend who wed and has four kids with actress/model Janet Jones. Wayne revealed to Howard Stern that he and Janet Jones "consummated their relationship" the night they met at an L.A. Lakers game in 1987. Stern's reply: "That's why they call you The Great One."

GAME MISCONDUCTS

Jordin Tootoo. Nicknamed The TooToo Train, the first native of Canada's Nunavut territory to make it to the NHL was an inspiring story. When the Nashville Predators enforcer hooked up with American Idol alum and country singer Kellie Pickler this spring, it was a match made in... an alternate universe. But a happy one just the same. That is, until he messed around on Kellie, who later told a sold-out crowd that her new theme song is Carrie Underwood's "Before He Cheats" and said she hoped Jordin Tootoo's teeth would be knocked out in a game. [*whistle*] You can take that TooToo Train straight to the penalty box, Jordin.

Sean Avery. The 27-year-old New York Rangers winger already has 913 career penalty minutes, and his off-ice exploits have certainly landed him in the sin bin of love more than once. Sean Avery is supposedly dating Mary-Kate Olsen and has been linked to Rachel Hunter and Elisha Cuthbert. He is also rumored to be the subject of Justin Timberlake's "What Goes Around... / ...Comes Around."

CUP CONTENDERS

Mike Comrie. Hilary Duff is known for being a good girl among raunchy celebs, but Mike Comrie is melting her ice! The two have been dating since July, and recent reports have Hilary gettin' freaky with the Islanders center - in public no less! The 2000 Hobey Baker Award finalist is now on his fifth NHL team, but it looks like he might be on Team Duff for quite some time.

Mike Modano. In December 2006, Mike Modano signed a lifetime deal with singer, Playboy centerfold and Dancing with the Stars alum Willa Ford. The former #1 overall pick has always known how to light the lamp (507 times career), and he's certainly lit a fire with Willa Ford. Modano hoisted the Stanley Cup in 1999, but snaring a trophy (wife) like this might be his best career goal.

Looks like the Olsen Twins are on an athletic kick of late. No, not playing sports themselves. Those anorexic waifs would faint in about two seconds.

They're apparently both dating athletes, however!

We've talked at length already this week about Ashley Olsen and Lance Armstrong reportedly doing the horizontal mambo. Or at least having drinks.

In any case, now it's high time her twin, Mary-Kate Olsen, got herself a new athletic supporter - and she has, in New York Rangers hockey player Sean Avery!

Avery, who was previously linked to Elisha Cuthbert and rumored to be the subject of Justin Timberlake's hit "What Comes Around Goes Around," has reportedly been seen squiring Mary-Kate Olsen all over the Big Apple (that's New York City).

Sean Avery: Hot hockey lovin' for Mary-Kate Olsen?

Poor Max Snow. But good for Mary-Kate Olsen. Sean Avery definitely knows a thing or two about lining up on top of the crease and trying to slip one between the pads.