It seems they really do make everything in China. And by everything we mean "hair stockings." Which aren't actually stockings for your hair as the name implies.
Oh no. No, hair stockings are much, much more...European.
Who needs pepper spray when women could just wear hair stockings to ward off would-be attackers? shudder.
The latest in anti-rape wear, the hosiery is billed as "super sexy, summertime anti-pervert full-leg-of-hair stockings essential for all young girls going out" by Sina Weibo user @HappyZhangJiang.
Well, sure, if by "super sexy" the women wearing these plan to attract Bigfoot at the bar.
And hosiery? In the summertime? Nope.
So, are these a joke or are they serious? A little of both? We're not sure.
Rape is often about power and not desire or attraction, so will a rapist really care about a woman who has the legs of an incredibly hairy man? Maybe. But probably not.
And the idea that a woman should have to make herself appear less attractive to ward off would-be rapists is part of the culture of victim blaming, so surely that's not the statement these hair stockings are trying to make.
Hopefully, these are meant as one seriously bizarre Asian fashion trend. And like any bad trend, these will probably die hard. Probably. We hope.
Fingers crossed that hair stockings don't end up on the runways at the next Fashion Week, amiright? Not even Gucci could make these work.