Attention, muthaphukkas: Samuel L. Jackson has a fun contest for you.
The actor is offering fans a chance to have their words read aloud by one of the world's best known voices.
Just write up to 300 words on Jackson's Reddit post and the comment that is upvoted the most times will be read in monologue form by the man who really hates having snakes on his plane.
The contest runs through today and supports the non-profit Alzheimer's Society.
Readers can donate $3 for a chance to win lunch with the star and/or $200 for an autographed hat.
We hear Morgan Freeman was going to offer his amazing pipes for a similar fundraiser... but the Oscar winner fell asleep.