Michael Lohan to Kate Major: I Will Kill You!

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Kate Major, Lindsay Lohan's ex-assistant and Michael Lohan's soon-to-be ex-fiancee, says he threatened to kill her, called her a "c**t" and kicked her in the face.

Never a sign of a stable, long-term relationship.

According to the police report and formal complaint she filed against the deadbeat dad she somehow agreed to marry, Michael Lohan assaulted her - and worse:

"My fiance Michael Lohan came home while I was sleeping in a sofa chair. He woke me up, yelling, 'Why didn't you pick up your cell phone, you stupid c**t.'"

"He then turned over the chair while I was still in it, tossing me to the floor. I crawled to the other side of the room to get away from him. He walked over to me, took his shoe off and kicked me in the face while I was still on the ground."

Michael Lohan Mug Shot

"He stood over me and said, 'I'm going to go back to jail cause of you, cause I will kill you.' He said all of this to me cause he is afraid I'm going to leave him."

"I am very afraid of him."

So are we. He and Mel Gibson should get together and swap ideas.

Kate Major says she hit her head on the wall, then the floor as she fell. According to the police report, officials observed "Minor swelling observed on [her] lip."

Michael says there was an argument but denied touching Kate. Apparently police don't buy it, since Kate now has "Temporary Order of Protection" against him.

The Order prohibits the hothead loser from communicating with Major in any way. He's also prohibited from having a "third party" contact or threaten her.

In the Order, signed by a judge at the Southampton Justice Court, he cannot engage in "any acts or threats of physical violence." We'll see if he can resist.

UPDATE: Michael has been charged with second degree harassment for the incident. He will be formally arraigned in Southampton, N.Y., court August 18.

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All I can say is two peas in a pod!!!

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Why isn't this guy Lodown Lohan locked up in a psych ward somewhere?

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WOW, no wonder Lindsey is what she is......she didn't have a chance. None. I bet this creep was loads of fun to grow up with, I can't imagine being a child with this garbage for a dad......what a loser. And a bit on the STUPID side too. Ever heard him speak? OMG, he's actually stupid. hahahahahahaha

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Nice Jason me too :)

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Wow, i bet this is all a trick by her. She saw her chance with the balance on his spotlight, and took it. I believe this is all a trick by her, to get back, or to get even with him. Seems like everyones beating on him and Mel Gibson. I mean seriously, people start coming out of the woodworks when one small incident occurs, like with Tiger Woods, i bet half those women he'd never even met. And seriously who cares if he called her a (c484) i call random people i pass by that when i feel like. Whooptyfreakindo.

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This Kate is no good even for him!

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Take a look at her. She has gotten very fat since they got engaged and as much as I don't care for Mr. Lohan, I have to give him credit for 6 years of sobriety and trying to love and live with somebody who is a drunk. Gotta be tough on him.

Michael Lohan Biography

Lohan, Michael It's a close race between Michael Lohan and Jon Gosselin for the world's worst celebrity father. In terms of making the argument for... More »
Full Name
Michael Lohan

Michael Lohan Quotes

Just like the [topless] Marilyn Monroe spread, Linds is my daughter and there are just some things a father doesn't want to see or hear, regardless of whether they are true or false.

Michael Lohan [on daughter dating Samanta Ronson]

Michael Lohan: Maybe her mother's life revolves around the tabloids and reports, but mine doesn't. I am into setting a good example and doing good things that don't deceive or exploit my kids. But I will say this: While we were a family, you never even saw or heard a negative thing about any of us.