Yesterday, we all heard that Lindsay’s ditched her Kabbalah red string bracelet in favor of the latest accessory: an ankle monitoring device that constantly tracks her blood alcohol content level through a process called “transdermal alcohol testing.”
But beware, warns fellow alchy-turned-bracelet-wearer “Cassie.” Apparently, in addition to being ‘impossible to tamper with,’ the anklet is also a fashion nightmare.
“It’s like a 1980s pager on either side of your ankle,” says Cassie, 22, who has worn the bracelet for more than five months after being caught drinking and driving on three separate occasions.
Cassie, who is one of 5,347 people wearing the bracelet in the United States, described the bracelet as “big and noticeable” and “very uncomfortable.” Her skin gets irritated under the bracelet and she can no longer wear her “cute boots” because of the bulky hardware.
Fortunately, Lindsay Lohan needn’t worry about the unfashionable nature of the alcohol-monitoring ankle bracelet.
Due to her celebrity status, it’s only a mere matter of time before her bestie, Chanel couture designer (and former fatty!) Karl Lagerfeld designs her a fashionable footwear line to accommodate the device…and then launches the shoes as a full-fledged designer line called ‘Monitor,’ which he prices at $500 a pair, before eventually selling knock-offs of his own designs to H&M, but only after obtaining a written assurance that “they won’t be sold to fat people.”
There are no comments yet. Post yours!