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Christina Aguilera: I’m Pregnant
Everyone Else: Duh

Finally satisfied that she milked her maybe-pregnancy for all it was worth (and even outlasted fellow obviously pregnant singer/album-promoter, Jennifer Lopez) Christina Aguilera has effectively ended months of definitive speculation by revealing that the giant, fetus-shaped protrusion in her uterus is, in fact, a fetus.

Next up for Aguilera: Landing an exclusive designer maternity wear contract, coming up with a suitably embarrassing celebrity baby name and paying her publicist to arm her with a steady string of (predictably) boring pregnancy/new mommy quotes, like “What am I craving the most? Sleep!” and “To tell you the truth, all I want is for my baby to be happy and healthy. And weigh at least 40 pounds.”

Nov 5, 2007 · Link · 3 Responses

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Comments (3)

No. 1
Axeldee says:

Posted: Nov 6, 2007 at 7:41 am


No. 2
Michael Parkatti says:

Now that she’s confirmed her pregnancy, will we start to see questions as to who the father is 😉

http://www.humblenarrator.com/…..andidates/

Posted: Nov 6, 2007 at 1:48 pm

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