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Jessica Alba directed her Teen Choice acceptance speech for the Female Hottie Award to a boy who wronged her 19 years ago! That was like what? Second grade?

“I would like to dedicate this award to a young man who has been on my mind for the last 19 years: Ross. Ross didn’t love me. I was pigeon-toed, I had a sway back, I was slightly cross-eyed, buck-toothed, I sucked my thumb. Look at me now, Ross! Look at me now! promised that if I kissed him he would choose me for baseball … I was still chosen last. I never trusted men again.”

This girl can hold onto a grudge. Jessica, let it go dear.