This week, TLC announced the 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After? Season 7 cast.
Well, mostly. As is so often the case ahead of the season premieres, the show has yet to reveal one couple.
The six announced couples are all familiar faces.
They all appeared in this jaw-dropping trailer for Season 7. Take a look:
Jenny Slatten and Sumit Singh, who starred on all three seasons of 90 Day Fiance: The Other Way, appear.
As you watch the beginning of the trailer (below), you will see Jenny ziplining.
Then the couple talk about their ups and downs — and how elating it is to finally be married.
Up next, we unfortunately see Big Ed Brown and Liz Woods.
Ed is no longer making a fool of himself by dousing his hair with mayonnaise, so he had to find a new trick.
Liz is waxing his back. Some viewers might enjoy watching the creep suffer. Others would rather not see him at all.
Liz has what we can only describe as “big hostage video energy” as she speaks to the confessional camera.
She understates that there is never a dull moment with Ed around.
Before he proposed to her, he broke up with her via text message at least 8 times, so we would have to agree.
A very recent couple, Kimberly Menzies and Usman “Sojaboy” Umar, are next.
Kim discusses their 18-year age gap while also dismissing it as an issue.
Frankly, most viewers think that Usman’s history — with “BabyGirl” Lisa Hamme — is a bigger issue, but whatever.
Speaking to the camera, Kimberly highlights the authenticity of their love.
As we still vividly remember, Usman played games with Kim’s expectations, resulting in several ugly disputes.
It’s unclear what qualifies these two to be happy at all, let alone “ever after,” but we’re sure that the show will tell us.
Angela Deem has always been beyond parody, and that has clearly not changed.
The ill-behaved grandmother’s various cosmetic surgeries have only made her bolder.
After citing that she has been “loyal” to husband Michael Ilesanmi, she video chats with a Canadian man.
“There’s that sexy baby,” Angela says in an indescribable accent while her latest mark dances at her behest.
She floats the idea of visiting him in Canada.
Michael, who is still her husband, does not appear in the trailer, but will almost certainly appear in the season.
Up next, fan-favorite Yara Zaya is speaking with a couple of friends.
Apparently, husband Jovi Dufren has some sort of “trust issue” that she does not understand.
Her friends suggest that Jovi is insecure because Yara is so unspeakably hot. That would make sense, actually.
Back at home, Jovi tells Yara that he worries that her friends are a bad influence.
However, we already know that — despite the trailer — their storyline will not be this shallow.
Apparently, Jovi and Yara were filming when Russia launched its brutal invasion of Ukraine. Yara, of course, is from Ukraine.
In February, Yara did interviews about the state of her home country as Putin shelled cities and bombed neighborhoods.
On Season 7, we will see Yara and Jovi weigh what they can do for her family.
This will be a very serious matter for a reality TV show to cover. This franchise is not always good at that.
Then we see Andrei Castravet meeting with an immigration attorney.
It sounds like someone is doing more than just badmouthing him — they are making “false” reports about him.
This could seriously endanger his legal status in the United States.
Elizabeth Potthast worries that they do not know who is trying to sabotage them.
It could be her brother Charlie, someone else, or even her brother Charlie.
Worst case scenario, Andrei could be deported to Moldova despite his documentation and marriage to Libby.
Back to Kimberly and Usman, they are having a very ugly confrontation.
His family is not supportive of their relationship (neither is hers, actually), and cite her inability to give him a child.
The idea of Usman taking a second wife is coming up, and things are getting ugly. Oh, and messy.
Kimberly knocks Usman’s milkshake all over him.
This is not the first drink-related “incident” between the two.
Kimberly feels that this is her being assertive and not submissive … which is technically true. But you can do both without making a mess.
Then we see Ed and Liz have an ugly fight, with Ed accusing Liz of “dishonesty.”
He complains that some other woman was “all over” Liz, though we do not know the context.
Ed, who outed ex-fiancee Rosemarie Vega as bi on international television, then demands to know if Liz is a lesbian.
Jenny and Sumit have the worst dispute of them all — but also the most unclear.
We don’t know why they are so unhappy in this moment, but Jenny does not want to “take” it any longer.
Is this about Sumit’s family? Is this about the realities of married life with their age gap? We don’t yet know.
There is the trailer in all of its glory.
The new season of the spinoff premieres on Sunday, August 28.
Episodes will air on TLC and on Discovery Plus the same day.
Any guesses on who the final couple of this season will be?
Some of the casting is already messy enough. Usman and Angela are castmates — the Tell All will be wild.
One more addition could throw the whole thing into chaos. But who is couple number seven?