Lindsay Lohan Reveals Hilarious Five-Year Plan: Mean Girls 2, An Oscar, Probably a Unicorn

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Even though Lindsay Lohan's stage debut in London was an utter disaster, the troubled "actress" remains as delusional as ever when discussing her future.

In a recent interview to promote her thus-far disastrous turn in David Mamet's Speed the Plow, LiLo discussed her five year plan and it's every bit as insane as you might expect.

Lindsay Lohan in the Hamptons

"In five years I would like to be married and have children and hopefully be at the Oscars, but that's as far as it goes now."

Gotta love how Lindsay rattles off a bunch of impossible feats and then basically shrugs like it's no big deal. "Ya know, maybe check out Neptune, cure Ebola. The usual."

The interviewer followed that up by asking about Mean Girls, because Lindsay's last successful movie from a decade ago is one of the few interview topics that won't cause her to bury her face in a pile of blow:

"I was with Tina Fey the other day and I said we should do another Mean Girls," Linds said. "Like an older version where they're all housewives and they're all cheating.  

Yes, even though Mean Girls came out ten years ago, Linds is still holding out hope for a sequel.

Does she even remember the first movie? We doubt Cady "Africa" Heron would wind up a miserable housewife who cheats on her husband.

Just because Lindsay is a drunken wreck doesn't mean all her characters have to go on to lead miserable lives. What's next, a Parent Trap sequel where the girls team up to break out of rehab?

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Lindsay Lohan Biography

Lindsay Lohan Photo
Lindsay Lohan is a troubled actress that hasn't starred in a mainstream movie in years. The star has been arrested for drug possession... More »
New York City
Full Name
Lindsay Dee Lohan

Lindsay Lohan Quotes

Tell him he's f*cking amazing, and I want to meet him.

Lindsay Lohan [on Michael Phelps]

I just want to live a happy, healthy year and continue on the path I've been on and be with the person I care about and my family.

Lindsay Lohan