John Earl Eutzy is an equal opportunity masturbator.
He was arrested outside a Florida convenience store after pleasuring himself and rotating which direction he was facing, for reasons unknown.
Ensuring everyone had a chance to see, maybe?
Seriousy, this happened. Eutzy, 37, was standing outside the store Tuesday when he unzipped his pants and began masturbating, according to police.
When he started, he was facing the Fort Walton Beach, Fla., store, but then rotated his body so that he was facing the road, then turned back towards the store.
Reports say Eutzy “changed his position several times.”
Deputies also noted that a witness had to escort a woman and frightened child to their car after seeing the man, who was intoxicated, going to town.
Eutzy was charged with lewd or lascivious exhibition.