Livid Ashton Kutcher Rants About House-Building Neighbor

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Ashton Kutcher apparently lost his $h!t earlier today when he was woken up by a neighbor, who started construction on a house at 7:30 in the morning.

Naturally, the actor picked up a camera and recorded this rant:

Along with his videotaped thoughts, which you can see above, he also blogged the whole thing all morning. Some of the highlights of that endeavor:

  • this SOB owl feces cougar placenta jack bone dick!
  • Jack ass 7am building a goddamn fort next to my house f'in up my view and noise polluting the entire f'in neighborhood with pounding steal
  • holy moly I'm gonna lose it!
  • this ass clown has another thing coming!
  • I'm gonna kill my neighbor!

That pretty much sums it up. For his part, the d!ckweed neighbor, a screenwriter named Bruce Goldsmith, says Ashton is acting "silly" and "doesn't want to deal with reality" - the city of L.A. allows him to commence construction at 7:00 a.m.

Goldsmith added, "they don't make hammers covered with rubber."

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My god, I love this man!!!!!!
He's fkn hilarious.