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Scientology Wedding to Finalize Katie Holmes Brainwashing

If you thought the Scientology way of giving birth (no speaking!), you won't believe what those freaks do at weddings.

MSNBC is reporting that the wedding of TomKat is going to be conducted in the traditional style of the Scientology CULT "religion," with the groom addressed as the "Man" and the bride addressed as the "girl."

The name of the "girl" will not even be spoken, and she is only referred to as "girl" or "you" by the handler. Er, minister. Tom Cruise's name will be declared to all who attend, of course.

If the Cruise-Holmes wedding really turns out to be a Scientology ceremony -- as has been widely reported -- any feminists in attendance might be a tad miffed, to say the least. Even a cute, little, irate Suri Cruise might get up and leave!

So would Stephen Baldwin, no doubt, if he were invited. Which we are going to go out on a limb and guess that he's not.

The vows for a Scientology wedding are more than a tad strange. Quoting from the book "The Background Ministry, Ceremonies & Sermons of the Scientology Religion," MSNBC reports that the minister asks a bride:

Oh, That Crazy TomKat!

And do you take
His fortune
At its prime and ebb
And seek
With him best fortune
For us all?
Do you?"

The minister then tells the groom:

Now, (Tom Cruise),
girls need clothes
And food and
Tender happiness and frills
A pan, a comb, perhaps a cat
All caprice if you will
But still
They need them.
Do you then
Provide?
Do you?

Do you, well, do you, do you? Huh? Eh? Eh? Answer! Good God. The staff at T.H. Gossip feels that Katie Holmes should take whatever dignity she has left and bolt for the door with Suri in tow. This Scientology crap is not only demeaning, it's just plain strange. Run for it -- girl!

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2 Comments

  1. Journalist Says:

    Sorry, I must tag this article as bigotry.

    The writer is simply allowing emotions to run away with decency. Apparently, tolerance is limited to topics that make up one's peer group.

    I first read the entirety of the Scientology wedding ceremony -- many Scientologists use it, others do not; we did not -- years ago. It was so beautiful in its simple poetry that I sat on a park bench with tears running down my cheeks.

    It's sad that prejudice, and hungrily believing hate-speech, can so encyst one's feelings that the writer cannot see, and no longer feel, the simple beauty in that ceremony of mutual commitment.

    As to the author's feminist concerns, s/he neglects to tell readers that the ceremony was written half a century ago in the parlance and customs prevalent in the United States at that time.

  2. Lady Llewellyn Says:

    Has anyone else heard that Tom Cruise, in effect, paid Katie's parents to enlist their "support" of the TomKat union? Well, if not their support, then at least their silence?

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