• Dina Lohan takes a break from capitalizing on her daughter’s fame to feign actual interest in her recovery.
• Britney Spears is rumored to be dating her drug therapist, John Sundahl. While this move could get Sundahl’s license revoked, it still puts him several notches about K-Fed on the “classy-meter.”
• The Bush administration nominates a total racist for the “Administrator of the U.S. Agency for International Development and director of foreign assistance” position.
• Paula Abdul is sick of being treated “like a piece of dog___.” Which is what makes her new reality tv show so amazing!
• Dave Chappelle may have walked away from a $50 million contract, but at least he gets showered with $100 bills everywhere he goes.
• Meanwhile, Seth Cohen may be a comic book geek, but Adam Brody spent an entire night caressing the back of that hot chick from Hostel II.