In case you haven’t heard, expired gossip Baird Jones’ memorial is tonight at The Plumm. Among the many hosts: Richard Johnson wedding crasher Doug Dechert. Interesting, though, because Jones and Dechert reportedly haven’t been seeing eye-to-eye for awhile now. Says a tipster: “After the Page Six scandal finished it’s course, Baird was no longer on good terms with Doug, though they were once close.” At least the party includes one thing Jones would’ve approved of: an open bar.
Hyphens are the new periods, at least in this note to Jossip from Steven “Hoop” Hooper, the artist and friend of Baird Jones who is throwing his farewell party at The Plumm tonight.
Greetings to all – The artist HOOP here – I helped Baird Jones give his soirees in most major and underground clubs in the city for over 20 years – I’m the guy with the crown – When Baird passed on there were several of his friends that had party ideas – And who is to say there won’t be more Baird Jones parties coming – But the Plumm gave the best deal on the best date – His memorial is on Saturday March 8th at Saint John the Divine at 2 – So a Friday night party the day before was perfect – Baird would have trouble with many clubs for nonpayment – cutting the bar short or not letting people in – but that’s the clubworld and he understood it – That does’t mean that we weren’t there the next week with another party – It happened all the time – There are countless crooked clubs – Baird did have a flair for publicity so a feud wasn’t a bad thing – I stored the millions of Baird Jones party passes he printed up – Free admission and free drinks for over 25 years – Okay you other party promotors – Beat that record – We’ll miss you Baird Jones –
Why isn’t Baird Jones’ memorial party being held at Webster Hall, where he was the “art curator” and rumored to have been paid $500 everytime he got Page Six to mention it? Good question. Better question: Why is tomorrow’s event being held at The Plumm, a club he tried to have closed and whose owner, Noel Ashman, Jones described as a “crook” whose “middle name is ‘fraud'”? Since he couldn’t publicly bash The Plumm, as he needed inside access to do his “reporting,” Jones privately corresponded with alleged Plumm vandal Ivy Supersonic; the two of them were well aware of Ashman’s tendency to stiff the very club promoters responsible for filling his venue with maybe-of-age models. Ashman denies the charge. [NYM]
Deceased gossip staple Baird Jones will be sent off Friday night at the Plumm, when all who knew him are invited to don their Yankee caps and trench coats for one last white wine toast. (The memorial service will be on Saturday.) Interestingly, Page Six is suddenly mourning the dead, and not using him as a punchline, and perhaps embellishing Jones’ biography: “Jones, who’d been a straight-A student and scored 1,600 on his SATs, would have gone to Harvard if he hadn’t insulted a teacher at Groton, who put the kibbosh on his acceptance. He settled for Columbia instead.”
Is this how you say goodbye to an old friend? “”He was always completely loaded, but he was always lucid,” says decrepit publicist R. Couri Hay to Page Six on the passing of column-filler Baird Jones. “He’s a guy who can’t be replaced. […] He’s lucky if he’s in Purgatory!”
• Since they???ve now started playing ???Crazy??? on adult contempo, expect a lot of painfully hip 40 somethings at this concert. (Thurs. 8/17) [NYM]
• Okay, we???re kind of cheesed out by this whole Amsterjam thing. But isn???t just a little part of you curious about how Busta Rhymes and Tom Petty will sound together? (Sat. 8/19) [Heineken]
• Nothing says summertime like watching Ray Liotta and Joe Pesci whack that guy from the Sopranos. (Wed. 8/16) [FreeNYC]
• $5 buys you all the champagne you can ever possibly drink. Which is pretty cheap considering how much the ambulance ride will cost you. (Tues. 8/15) [MyOpenBar]
• Wu-Tang Clan, at Webster Hall? Seriously, go and watch Baird Jones dance. Totally worth it. (8/16) [Oh My Rockness]
Doug Dechert went to Richard Johnson‘s wedding. We went to Dechert’s party last night.
Please, please don’t ask us why. Maybe it’s because we hadn’t seen Doug since he spent an entire dinner hitting on our editor at Veronda last summer. Or, maybe because we were so high off our Ariel Foxman sighting we thought we were invincible to the horrors of Lloyd Grove and Jared Paul Stern‘s overage stringers.
Still, in the name of gossiping, we are publicly shaming ourselves and admitting our attendance at this pathetic showing — mainly so that we can publicly shame Baird Jones, who happens to be a huge Dechert groupie.
It actually pained us to see the poor guy, sporting his usual Yankee cap and 1980’s Sherlock Holmes business suit, dancing awkwardly to Sugar Ray. If you don’t get the picture, this still rendition of the clash might help. Jump at your own risk.
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