Charlie Sheen has officially lost his mind.
After a series of bizarre, rambling rants by the actor on Thursday, CBS and Warner Bros. Television has pulled the plug on Two and a Half Men.
In interviews with The Alex Jones Show and TMZ which Sheen gave while on vacation in the Bahamas, the actor went on several tirades, targeting everything from Alcoholics Anonymous to his ex-wife to Thomas Jefferson, and in particular Two and a Half Men creator Chuck Lorre.
In the radio interview with Jones, Sheen starts out talking about the women in his life — porn star Bree Olson, and former nanny and model Natalie Kenly.
Telling Jones he is 0 for 3 in respect to marriages, he says of his “goddesses,” “What we all have is a marriage of the heart…of the hearts. To sully, contaminate or radically disrespect this unit with a shameful contract is something I’ll leave to the amateurs and the Bible grippers.”
Ex-wife Brooke Mueller had also reportedly moved in with Sheen and the two other women, and was part of the entourage in the Bahamas, but Sheen tells Jones she is no longer part of the “crew.”
“Where there were four, there are now three,” says Sheen. “Goodbye Brooke, and good luck in your travels. You’re going to need it – badly,” he says.
“I’m so tired of pretending like my life isn’t perfect and bitchin’ and just winning every second,” he tells Jones. “I’m not perfect, and bitching and just delivering the goods at every frickin turn. Because look what I’m dealing with, man – I’m dealing with fools and trolls. I’m dealing with soft targets.”
“I don’t have time for these clowns. I don’t have time for their judgment and their stupidity. You know, they lay down with their ugly wives in front of their ugly children and just look at their loser lives, and then they look at me and they say ‘I can’t process it.’ Well, no, and you never will, so stop trying. Just sit back and enjoy the show”
Referring to a line from “Apocalypse Now” Sheen says, “You have the right to kill me, but you do not have the right to judge me. Boom. That’s the whole movie. That’s life. There’s nobility in that. There’s focus. It’s genuine, and it’s crystal and it’s pure. And it’s available to everybody.”
Talking about the former women in his life, whom he calls “turds” and “losers” Sheen says, “There’s no reason to then bring them back into the fold because I have real fame – they have nothing. They have zero. They have that night. And I will forget about them as the last image of them exits my beautiful home. And they will get out there and they will sell me and they will lose. And they will lose the rest of their lives as they think about me and my life the rest of their life.”
Sheen then launches into a tirade on Two and a Half Men creator, Chuck Lorre. “Man, I’m here to tell you, and I’m tired of being told ‘You can’t talk about that, you can’t talk about that.’ Bull-S-H-I-T. Let me just say this…that it’s nothing less than just this side of deplorable that a certain Chaim Levine — yeah, that’s Chuck’s real name — mistook this rock star for his own selfish exit strategy, bro. Check it, Alex. I embarrassed him in front of his children and the world, by healing at a pace that his un-evolved mind cannot process. Last I checked, Chaim, I’ve spent close to the last decade effortlessly and magically converting your tin cans into pure gold, and the gratitude I get is this charlatan chose not to do his job, which is to write. Clearly someone who believes he’s above the law.”
“I got magic, and I got poetry in my fingertips,” Sheen says about himself.
When asked about whether he will be working on the movie, Major League III, Sheen says they are hung up in negotiations and that if they want him in it, it’s “a smash,” and if they don’t, it’s “a turd that opens on a tugboat.”
When asked why he decided to “unleash himself” on the broadcast, Sheen replies, “Why give an interview when you can leave a warning. I’m not fair game. I’m not a soft target. It’s over. There’s a new sheriff in town. And he has an army of assassins.”
“My motto now is you either love or you hate,” Sheen continues. “And you must do so violently. And you have to hate everybody that’s not in your family, because they’re there to destroy your family. And they will come at you in all forms and shapes. And therefore there’s nothing in the middle. I don’t live in the middle anymore. That’s where you get slaughtered. That’s where you get embarrassed…in front of the prom queen. And it’s just not an option. And within that is tremendous focus, and tremendous clarity, and tremendous peace.”
Focus? Clarity? Peace? Seriously?
“I have cleansed myself. I closed my eyes and in a nanosecond, I cured myself… It’s the work of sissies. The only thing I’m addicted to is winning,” says Sheen. “This bootleg cult, arrogantly referred to as Alcoholics Anonymous, reports a 5 percent success rate. My success rate is 100 percent. Do the math … another one of their mottoes is ‘Don’t be special, be one of us.’ Newsflash: I am special, and I will never be one of you! I have a disease? Bulls**t! I cured it with my brain, with my mind. I cured it, I’m done … you don’t look like you’re having a lot of fun. I’m gonna hang out with these two smoking hotties and fly privately around the world. It might be lonely up here but I sure like the view, Alex!”
Ohhhh, that’s not all. And, dare I say, it gets even better. Or worse, as the case may be.
If you are so inclined, you can listen to the entire radio rant, and I’ll continue with the rest of this story, because it most certainly doesn’t end here.
After the rambling radio interview, Sheen launched yet another raging tirade with TMZ that began with the actor challenging Chuck Lorre to a fight in the octagon. “If he wins, he can leave MY show!” Sheen said.
He went on to say that he violently hates Chaim Levine (Chuck Lorre), calling him a “stupid, stupid little man and a p**sy punk that I’d never want to be like.”
“You can tell him (Lorre) one thing,” Charlie told TMZ. “I own him.”
CBS and Warner Bros. responded by issuing a statement that they are halting production of Two and a Half Men:
“Based on the totality of Charlie Sheen’s statements, conduct and condition, CBS and Warner Bros. Television have decided to discontinue production of Two and a Half Men for the remainder of the season.”
Sheen responded with…wait for it…wait for it…another RANT!
In an open letter sent to TMZ, the actor writes:
What does this say about Haim Levine after he tried to use his words to judge and attempt to degrade me. I gracefully ignored this folly for 177 shows … I fire back once and this contaminated little maggot can’t handle my power and can’t handle the truth. I wish him nothing but pain in his silly travels especially if they wind up in my octagon. Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words — imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists. I urge all my beautiful and loyal fans who embraced this show for almost a decade to walk with me side-by-side as we march up the steps of justice to right this unconscionable wrong.
Remember these are my people … not yours…we will continue on together…
Charlie Sheen
Oh Charlie, I try so hard not to be snarky, but you have left me no choice. I’m no doctor, but, Narcissistic Personality Disorder much?