Calvin Harris Threatens to Sue Over Hand Job Allegations

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Calvin Harris would like to make something very clear:

He did not receive any hand jobs from any massage parlors and anyone who says anything to the contrary may want to go out and hire a lawyer.

Calvin Harris Photograph

Earlier this week, Radar Online spread the rumor that Taylor Swift dumped Harris because the DJ was spotted leaving an establishment known for providing its clients with "happy endings."

(No, we're not referring to copies of the canceled ABC sitcom.)

But just as fans were starting to sympathize with poor Taylor and lament yet another failed romantic entanglement, Harris jumped on Twitter and wrote the following last night:

"It’s not going to be a ‘happy ending’ for everyone I sue for defamation of character for all these bullshit stories bye bye."

Nice. Well played, Calvin, both for the definitive denial and also for the perfectly-placed pun.

It certainly does seem like a stretch to believe that Calvin Harris would risk his relationship with Swift just to receive some manual pleasure from a stranger.

Although Harry Styles supposedly split with the artist in 2013 because Swift was too prude.

Prior to Calvin’s threat, though, Swift’s rep came out with a simple statement of his own, telling the world:

“I’ve said it before and I’m saying it again, do not believe Radar Online.”

Sounds like someone has some bad blood with Radar Online, eh? Eh? HEY!

Sorry. Point being: hooray for Taylor and Calvin! May they live happily ever after!

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