When Lauren Conrad, Audrina Patridge, Stephanie Pratt and Lo Bosworth came up with the idea to "crash" (somehow they knew precisely where to stay) Brody and the guys' bros-only weekend in Hawaii, we knew some drama was gonna go down.
But not like this.
At first, Brody Jenner seemed upset, to see them, but all was forgiven at the mention of shots. And why shouldn't it be. It's Hawaii, and hey, there were now cute girls in bikinis along with surfing and copious quantities of alcohol. Holla!
Talk turned to Audrina Patridge and her "hate-love relationship" with that douche Justin-Bobby. She said she's not waiting for him to come around.
Ever the gentleman Brody noted and complemented his friend on her "most revealing one-piece." Stephanie clarified again that Audzo is single.
At this point, you know where this is headed.
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Later, Frankie Delgado, Doug Reinhardt and some dude who calls himself Sleazy T teased Brody about Audrina, who told the girls that she's crushin' on Brody.
Brody Jenner assured the guys that Audzo and he are just friends and that he was thinking about his girlfriend, Jayde Nicole, who was not present of course.
During some late-night alone time, he sought to quell the sexual tension, until ...
"I don't want it to be awkward," he said. "You are sweet and a good friend, but if we decide one night late with nobody around, well, feelings are feelings."
Audrina Patridge didn't emerge until morning.Post walk-of-shame, she made no apologies for sleeping in Brody's room. Doug called Brody out after he'd seen Audzo leaving his room at the crack of dawn.
Brody was honest at least, saying, "I messed up. I cheated."
He was rather nonchalant, however, considering this isn't candid camera and he knows full well this secret would eventually be televised on The Hills.
Like Spencer Pratt with bartender Stacie, how does that not play into his thinking when deciding to hook up with some other girl? To be fair, we don't know the extent of what happened that night, but it's very, very odd.
Speaking of the Devil himself, back in Los Angeles, Spencer wasn't pleased to hear that Heidi's virginal ex Colby was going to town with his new girlfriend, but agreed to do dinner with the out-of-town couple anyway.
There, he rode Colby constantly about his devoutly religious ways.
"If I was a virgin," Heidi's now-husband opined, "I would be a mixed martial arts fighter or in Delta Force. I would die. You're like hanging out with an alien."
The bonding continued at that night's Bible study, where Heidi thought he might learn something from her former flame's ethics, which could then translate to being nicer to her and getting along better with her family.
While he did pay her ex some genuine compliments, Spencer noted that if he were to morph into Colby, Heidi would dump him in a week for being so dull.
All she could do was roll her eyes. Just another day in the life of the incomparable Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt. Oh, how we love to hate them so.