Warning: The following article is NSFW.
We don't mean there's anything risque in it, just that if you read it while you're at work, you're certain to become deeply depressed.
Whether you like it or not, by now you're probably familiar Danielle Bregoli, aka the "Cash Me Ousside Girl," aka living proof that society isn't ready for the Internet.
In case you've spent the last month living a life of ignorant bliss beneath an extremely heavy rock, allow us to bring you up to speed.
(And destroy your faith in humanity at the same time.)
In September of 2016, Danielle Bregoli appeared in one of those "out of control kid" segments of The Dr. Phil Show.
The 13-year-old berated her mother, challenged the audience to a fight, and called a bunch of women she just met "hoes."
For reasons that remain unclear, the Internet loved every second of it. Bregoli even has her own catchphrase: "Cash me ousside!"
As in, catch me outside so that we can fight, because I'm an extremely angry child, and the world is a terrible place.
Naturally, after this nonsense went viral, Bregoli has a reality show in the works, and she's amassed more than 8 million followers on Instagram.
There's no denying that she's popular in the way that such characters are online, but is she making any money off her sudden fame?
The answer: yes.
A depressing amount of cash inside her bank account in an astonishingly short period of time.
Danielle makes appearances at clubs and music festivals these days, netting five figures a gig.
According to TMZ she'll be paid $40,000 to take the stage at Miami’s Rolling Loud fest in May.
And then there's her social media presence:
Danielle has been hocking for the usual Instagram staples - Fit Tea and Postmates - and based on the size of her following?
Industry experts estimate she's making upwards of 50 grand for each of those posts she shares with those aforementioned followers.
(Try to aim away from the screen while vomiting.)
So Danielle will easily earn somewhere in the high six figures this year, and we haven't even factored in what she'll be paid for her reality show.
So let this be a lesson to all you kids out there:
Being mean to your parents, and popping off on daytime TV to boot, pays off big time, and it can make you famous overnight.
In a word (or three, depending on your view):