On The Real Housewives of New York City Season 8 Episode 2, Bethenny Frankel held a birthday barbecue at her Hamptons home.
The ladies, as expected, brought the drama. And their bras. That's right, it was a bra party. One might even call it the bra party from hell.
You don't have to watch The Real Housewives of New York City online to know that this crazy crew never fails to ruin a relaxing trip.
Not that it's ever really relaxing, but you get the idea. There is no get-together that isn't marred by some insane argument or situation.
To make a long story short, the ladies are all terrible at guessing their bra sizes, which was part of the game they were playing here.
Before they could even try any on, however, the back-talk began.
Dorinda told Ramona and Carole that it was weird that they got lunch together. Ramona said that Carole wasn't there for her. Et cetera.
Bethenny called Dorinda out on always selling John to the women, and how he tried to pitch her business ideas behind Dorinda's back.
"I'm not selling John to you about s--t. That's bulls--t," Dorinda said. "Guess what Bethenny Frankel, you're not the word according to god."
"You're not the gospel. I get to do what I want to do."
That's the quote of Season 8 thus far right there.
They mixed it up some more, with Carole agreeing re: John's behavior, and then Ramona got into the act by regurgitating a John story.
One she heard from a friend in which John said he gets wasted, then takes a bunch of Viagra and puts it to Dorinda for like six hours.
All while a bra saleswoman was there. Classic.
Next week, John shows up as the bra party continues unabated, so if you thought that this trip to hell was a one-off, you thought wrong.
In other news, Jules Wainstein may not be able to make good coffee but really is a hands on, cool mom. Or so she really wants us to think.
Sonja Morgan and Luann de Lesseps are still broing out at Sonja's place, which could possibly be a potential reality show in itself.
Luann thinks Carole Radziwill is obsessed with Bethenny Frankel's anus, while Carole says her dream interaction with Luann is this:
"In my fantasy I'd go up to her and be like, ‘You bitch [throws drink],' but in reality I would just politely ignore her."
Sounds about right.
Carole also said she's not sure of her future with Adam, since he wants kids, but she feels she has only a few good summers left.
For her part, Dorinda Medley says that she Nairs John's back, while Ramona took off all her curtains after Mario moved out last year.
Literally, we think.
Finally, Luann texts her new catchphrase, according to Bethenny: "She kept sending these texts, ‘uncool. Don't be all uncool.'"