Wow! Is Nickelodeon finally returning to its glory days and giving adults a reason to watch TV with their kids? This hasn???t happened since The Adventures of Pete & Pete went away*.
Do you care who Maxim editors don’t want to sleep with? No? Well, they think you do. Which is why they slapped this wonderful list of un-fuckable women on television. Sure, one’s a cartoon, another is a teenager, and another is an Amy Sedaris caricature … but that doesn’t save anyone from the titles.
Nancy Grace is at number 1, with the rest of the countdown starting at 10. (We don’t really understand why they would rather do it with Christiane Amanpour over Tina Fey, but we’ll guess it’s the accent.)
10. Christiane Amanpour, CNN
9. Pam Grier, The L Word
8. Ugly Betty, Ugly Betty
7. Peggy Hill, King of the Hill
6. Fran Drescher, Living with Fran
5. Jerri Blank, Strangers With Candy
4. Tina Yothers, Celebrity Fit Club 4
3. Tina Fey, 30 Rock
2. Calamity Jane, Deadwood
In other news, most women admit to not wanting to sleep with Jimmy Jellinek or Chris Wilson.
TV’s Least Appealing Ladies [Maxim]
How do you know it’s summer? When every publication out there takes the liberty of providing you with a handy summer guide. It’s even a double issue — yay!
Which makes Intern Zack‘s crappy slave duties even more exhausting. Whereas most people prefer to take their New York in little bites over a seven day period, Zack has the unfortunate duty of sucking up an entire issue in about an hour. Hey, at least he’s reminded that the only purpose of being in this godforsaken place all summer is the sweet relief of rooftop bars.
• It ain’t summer without NYM telling you where to fatten up on lobster rolls. It brings back memories of college and a sand shack in Williamsburg … if we hadn’t had 7 margaritas, we might even remember what is was called. [Consider the Lobster Roll]
• When you sell out to AOL, little indy mags like New York will give you crap for it. Even if you’re a one-man blog empire named Jason Calacanis, whose pockets are overflowing with “fuck you money.” [Suit 2.0]
• In this weather, outer ugliness in the form of frizzy hair and peeling skin is easy. It’s exposing your inner ugliness which takes a true talent. Amy Sedaris should be a role model for us all. [Amy Sedaris Gets Up in Your Grill]
• The other awful thing about summer? Pop music singles that top charts, and Jessica Simpson pretending she’s good for something besides entertaining us on Newlyweds. [You Think She????????s In Love With You]
• Though Woody Allen has been creepy for more than two decades now, it’s only one season a year when his new point of obsession, Scarlett Johansson, can wear a Marilyn Monroe style bathing suit and get away with it. [And God Created Scarlett]
Table of Contents [New York]