Larissa even jokes about her trauma
Larissa, who by her own admission is not unreasonably afraid of police, jokes that they SHOULD call the police ... because Eric has stolen her heart. Deeply cheesy, but cute.
Speaking of her trauma
For the final hearing of her court case, Larissa didn't even have to show up. Her hot lawyer handled it for her.
Between this and her divorce, she has severed all ties with Colt and Debbie. (If only Jess were so lucky)
Colt fired three "bullets" at her
But Larissa is gleeful at having dodged all three. She is at peace.
Paul and Karine Staehle
Setting aside their very upsetting 2020 drama for a moment, the couple were having issues last year. Karine locked herself in the bathroom. Paul claims that she does this all of the time.
He wants sympathy
He feels like Karine is being unfair (and we will say that occupying a household's only bathroom for hours is not great). But we also only hear his side of things. Generally, when someone locks themselves in a bathroom, they're desperately trying to get a little peace or process intense emotions. We only have Paul's word that this is "mood swings," for whatever that's worth.
Paul wants to talk to her. He has also been knocking incessantly on the door while the cameras were rolling. It seems that Karine cannot get privacy or time to collect her thoughts in their tiny home.
Paul's mom shows up and she has brought them food, which was very nice of her. Karine quickly assures her that she is feeling bad, but that her current mood has nothing whatsoever to do with Mary.
If anyone knows what a headache Paul can be, it's his mom. But also, she says that she gets that Karine is alone in a totally different place -- and Paul doesn't have a job yet -- and it has to be overwhelming. She worries that Karine might leave. Meanwhile, Paul complains to his mom, sharing his (and only his) side of things.
Mary stays with sleeping Pierre
In the mean time, Paul is going to go talk to Karine whether she likes it or not, so he begins to ... we will very generously call it "run."
We absolutely made a gif of it
As Karine has said accurately of her husband many times, "Paul is ridiculous." We don't fault him for running strangely -- different people run in different ways. That he chose to do this on camera, getting tired seconds later and stopping while still on camera, was another example of the bizarre behavior that Paul has exhibited for years.
Paul tries and fails to talk to her before declaring that it's "too hot for this s--t." Here's some advice: if a loved one wants some alone time, give them the space that they need. Especially if it's just for a few minutes.
Colt Johnson and Jess Caroline
Colt ended up getting a new room (by our count, that is three different hotel rooms in one trip to Brazil) after Jess' shoe-yeeting reaction to learning that Colt has been lying to her this whole time about his continued friendship with Vanessa.
Jess admits that she tried to hurt his feelings
She did not actually go bone any of her exes or anyone else, she just said that because she was furious with Colt.
Colt had wronged her
And he attempts, in his super condescending tone, to twist that around, but Jess corrects him.
She mocks his claims of innocense
Honestly, "I good boy, I good person" is just a very funny way to characterize someone. It also reflects how Colt would like to be seen, despite his behavior.
He can't admit that he did anything wrong
He tries to justify his lie to her. This is a pattern with him. Notably, this same episode, Larissa notes that Eric has improved on this front, and he's nearly a decade Colt's junior. Admit when you're wrong, folks.
W H Y ???
Jess has decided to give Colt another chance, a choice that she will live to regret. (That's not a prediction, it's a fact)
Debbie is astonished
Colt tells his mom that he and Jess patched things up, and her face says it all.
In the car, Debbie tries to cause MORE problems on purpose
They are en route to the airport, but Debbie tries to grill Jess on her behavior the night before. She insists that maybe Colt simply omitted his friendship with Vanessa rather than lying. Jess corrects her -- no, he lied outright. He even manufactured fake texts to prove to Jess that he and Vanessa weren't friends.
Then, at the airport
Debbie was literally changing "don't propose, don't propose" not ten feet from where Colt and Jess were saying their goodbyes.
What a character
It's unclear where Debbie got the idea into her head that Jess is trying to "use" Colt. Really, Debbie and Colt have an unhealthy bond that does a disservice to them both. And, of course, it prevents Debbie from seeing her son for who and what he is. Does she even know that Colt has slept with Vanessa? If so ... she's not done sabotaging this couple.
Syngin Colchester and Tania Maduro
Syngin is going solo this episode, hanging out with his buddies who are also his former roommates. And they do not particularly like Tania.
They look exactly like every sitcom character's former roommates
One is hot, one looks eccentric, and they are needlessly wild and loud.
Syngin is ready to DRINK
Ignoring his wife's concerns about his alcohol consumption and tendency to be self-destructive, Syngin is HYPED to drink "until dawn." They also order jaeger shots which is ... a choice. If you like licorice flavored jelly beans, you'll love jaegermeister.
Everybody's having fun
That said, his friends do admit to the camera that they didn't particularly like Tania. He brought her home one day from work and they had a bit of culture shock. Our guess? Their home wasn't particularly clean and they may have been loud and obnoxious.
Speaking of obnoxious
They give Syngin grief for having gained weight. We know that different places have different cultures but ... wow. Anyway, they also laugh over Syngin being "a pounds guy" because her refers to his weight in pounds rather than kilos.
Syngin teases he may remain in South Africa forever
That's ... a very complicated statement to make for a married man. But it's also the big question on their current arc.
Syngin admits that he married too soon, maybe
But that doesn't mean that he has decided to peace out of his marriage to Tania, of course. He's ... deeply undecided.
Kalani Faagata and Asuelu Pulaa
Asuelu goes over to visit his mom and sisters and other family, delivering gifts to them. But not handing over $1,000 to his mom, which was her demand the previous night.
He wanted to talk to her alone
Without Kalani present, he wants to speak to his mom and sister. It's not to go behind Kalani's back -- it's because he doesn't want to make his family look bad in Kalani's eyes.
His money is Kalani's money
Asuelu doesn't exactly make a lot, but what he does make goes towards his family. He is a father of two. Samoan customs or not, his mom cannot bleed him dry of most of his monthly income. Also, economic realities in the US are different than in Samoa.
Asuelu's sister has a theory
She thinks that Kalani is controlling Asuelu, which to her is a much simpler explanation than Asuelu realizing that he can't be a responsible father AND engage in a generational pyramid scheme in which young people pay money to their elders for decades.
They talk about him like he's not even there
They start to theorize that because Kalani is a few years older than Asuelu, she is dominating their marriage and making him be like this.
Asuelu gets up to go. He is upset, but he hugs everyone goodbye. He also acknowledges to the camera that his sister downright hates Kalani because she is not "letting" him pay exhorbitant tribute to his mom.
They go to see some goats (not the first time that goats have shown up on this season), and Asuelu's mom starts petting a goat and calling it baby ... and then immediately asks if they can be eaten as food. The symbolism for how she sees her son is pretty apparent.