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Publicists say the darndest things / Jossip

Wed / 04 May 2005
Publicists say the darndest things

» More Media > Books

While our inboxes may share Vioxx and reduced home mortgage rate invitations, we’re hoping yours isn’t on the receiving end of publicist pitches – because then you could go start a website of your own and put us more out of business than we already are.

But every so often we get a missive from a citizen of Public Relations Nation that warms our heart, and today was one of those days. And we’re just pleased as Spederline, so we wanted to bring you in on the conversation. (Names redacted to spare the flacks.)

Publicist writes in:

I’m representing a celebrity who want’s a book deal..Please direct me to right source…Recently she has been asked to participate on ”Oprah and Goodmorning America”..She passed due to the fact of inconvience,no pay,and nothing to promote…Call at your earliest…

“Fantastic!” you’re thinking, right? Us either! But we always try to respond to advice-seekers, so we returned with:

Not sure what you’re looking for with Jossip, as we aren’t a book publisher.. just some press? It’s pretty standard not to be paid for those appearances aside from an AFTRA fee or something marginally more, so I’m not sure what else you’d be expecting. And if this said “celebrity” is indeed a celebrity, he/she always has something to promote: him/herself.

As for helping your client land a book deal .. now THAT is something one gets paid for, and referral fees aren’t cheap.

Not too much sass, not too much crass we’re thinking. Moments later we’re hit up again:

Thanks for replying..My friend told me to find Judith
..How do I get a hold of her ??? By the way..I know a ton of celebs and alot of naughty things….

A publicist who takes advice from friends? This is new, unless you happen to be Lizzie Grubman and your friend is Jonny Cheban. But “finding” Judy Regan is a lot like finding the hole in a condom (shot at with an automatic weapon). But who are we to delete sans response?

Haha. Sorry, Judith stopped taking our calls a couple months ago when we may or may not have referred to her as “that coniving book bitch.” But you could look up Regan Books/HarperCollins on probably .. it should be right next to the dominatrix listings.

We, uh, haven’t heard back.

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