· Paris Hilton‘s Carl’s Jr. ad is such a hit, the burger joint is expanding its reach. Originally only airing on the West Coast, her Bentley suds splashing will soon be seen in the Midwest and Southeast.
· Michael Jackson is still under contract to deliver another album to Sony, though former chief Tommy Mottola had said he’d let the newly acquitted pop star shop around to other labels to find a new deal. Only problem is, no label wants him. Kinda like his reality show.
· Lindsay Lohan needed to pee real bad, but the men’s room was closer so she opted to pop a squat among the fellas. Though she brought in her male bodyguard to keep those gyno gossips from telling her tales from the loo.
· Queen Latifah hasn’t paid her New Jersey office space bills since November. But forget that: Her bodyguards hate Jews!
· Amy Sacco‘s new restaurant Bette would like your name and number, but don’t think about actually scoring a table.
· Britney Spears‘ days of spreading STDs may be over, but she’s still topping the list of celebrities associated with sending malicious software through email. Who’d she have to beat to get to the top? Bill Gates.
· 50 Cent has pulled out of his Live 8 gig in Philadelphia “due to a scheduling conflict.” Those free tickets selling on eBay just took a hit. Now that there’s an empty slot in the roster, it’s time for Michael Jackson to sign on.
· Kirsten Dunst is “just friends” with Jake Gyllenhaal, and any new fella in her life better accept that he’s still in her life.
· Shocker: Michael Lohan and Kevin Federline make Stuff magazine’s worst celeb dads list.
· It’s another four years (and $3 million) of Geraldo Rivera on Fox News, where he’ll remain a “correspondent-at-large” and host his weekend show At Large.