Lamar Odom Regrets Being Super Horny, Coked Up Wildman During Marriage to Khloe

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Due to his unrelenting substance abuse addiction, Lamar Odom never fulfilled his potential as a basketball player.

The former first round pick won a couple NBA titles, but his career fell short of expectations from those who predicted the versatile power forward could be a Hall of Fame candidate.

Lammy

However, in an excerpt from his new memoir, "Darkness to Light," Odom sounds like his main regret in life has nothing to do with his play on the court.

And everything to do with his actions off of it.

Especially when it came to Khloe Kardashian and the couple's four-year marriage.

"I wish I could have been more of a man," Odom told People Magazine in an interview this week that went with an excerpt from his book, adding of the misbehavior that led to his divorce:

"It still bothers me to this day. But regret is something we have to learn to live with."

Lamar with Khloe

Khloe and Odom for married back in 2009...  just one month after they met.

It seemed like a rash and flat out awful idea at the time, but it actually became clear through their interactions on Keeping Up with the Kardashians and the spinoff Khloe and Lamar and just in life in general:

These two truly were in love.

"For a while, being with her was bliss and I was the happiest I've ever been," Odom writes in his memoir.

"We were one of the most famous couples in Hollywood and we made more money together than we had individually."

Odom also says he was "faithful" to his wife at the outset of his marriage.

But then? From there?

Lamar Odom at Kids Choice

"I could not handle the lethal cocktail of the spotlight, addiction, a diminishing career and infidelity," he confessed, adding in personal detail:

"Oh, did I mention the paranoia, anxiety, depression. ...I couldn't keep my d-ck in my pants or the coke out of my nose.

"Drug addicts are incredibly skilled at hiding their habit. I'd get defensive and Khloé would just drop it."

According to various sources, the Kardashians have been very concerned about the release of this tell-all, afraid Odom would expose their secrets.

But the portions made available to the public so far paint Lamar as the bad guy -- and he's the one doing the painting.

Khloe and Lamar: 19th Annual Race to Erase MS

Although Khloe and Lamar broke in 2013, the reality star was by her ex-husband's side after he nearly died after a drug overdose in 2015.

Hitting what had to have been rock bottom at the time, Odom was found unconscious back then, having passed out at a brothel in Las Vegas.

In the days, Khloe and Odom's loved ones were legitimately unsure whether Lamar would make it.

As for why Kardashian rushed to Lamar's hospital bed? Despite the way he had treated her during the end of their relationship? All the times he had cheated on her?

"Her love for me must have been unconditional," he says. "That's the only thing [I think] that gave her the strength to still love me at that time."

It's Lamar

Khloe, of course, is now single.

She broke up with Tristan Thompson a few months ago after that basketball player also stepped out on her one too many times.

Naturally, the Internet has therefore been wondering just when Odom will make his love.

He must want to get back together with the love of his life, right?

Probably.

At this point, though, he's well aware of how impossible a dream that would be to achieve and says he's drug-free and simply hoping he can be on good terms with his ex-wife and in-laws.

"I hope we can be friends," Odom says. "I miss the family. And I hope we can all be reacquainted one day."

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Lamar Odom Biography

Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom
After bouncing around the NBA for years, Lamar Odom became a valuable member of the Los Angeles Lakers. He's won multiple world titles as... More »
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Lamar Odom