Jim Bob Duggar to Teach Grandparenting Seminar (We Wish We Were Kidding)

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We haven't heard a worse announcement of celebrities taking their show on the road since the news that Bill Cosby is coming to town.

This time around, the advice-givers who should be giving advice to exactly no one are Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar.

Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar, Kitchen Hug

Specifically, they're hosting an event where they'll tell people how to be grandparents. We wish we were kidding.

Not everybody has the gumption to think that they are in a position to tell other people who are experienced with life and parenting how exactly they should go about being grandparents.

But not everybody is the Duggar patriarch, Jim Bob Duggar.

The Duggars tend to try to portray their critics as anti-Christian, but their particular vein of fundamentalism is so extreme that most criticisms against the reality family come from Christians themselves.

This is a family where daughters are viewed as essentially the property of their fathers until they're married off -- at which point they must submit and belong to their husbands.

Some of Jim Bob's daughters seem to be able to break away from their family beliefs only when they marry, as Jim Bob has some passionate disagreements about theology with some of his sons-in-law.

Jim Bob Duggar and Michelle Duggar on Vacation

Even in the area of parenting, the Duggars have been accused of terrible things, including physical abuse and covering up the fact that their son, Josh Duggar, molested five young girls.

So they're not really in a position to give anyone advice.

But you know that some of their hardcore fans will go anyway.

In the Duggar Family blog, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar extend an invitation for people to attend their grandparenting seminar.

"You're invited to a free grandparenting conference!"

Tell us that that doesn't send a chill right down your spine!

"If you're a grandparent in Arkansas, Missouri, Kansas, Oklahoma, or Texas, you won't want to miss this special event on September 16th: The Heart of Grandparenting Conference in our hometown, Springdale, Arkansas."

Surely the people of Texas have better things to be doing than learning how to grandparent ... especially since being a grandparent is usually a no-brainer compared to parenting.

Jim Bob Duggar Eye Roll

"You will hear about the joys and challenges of grandparenting and how to use your spiritual influence to bless your children and grandchildren."

First of all, wouldn't grandparents -- the people they're inviting -- already know the joys and challenges of being who and what they are?

Second of all, though, most people of any faith would know how to bless or otherwise pray for their children and grandchildren.

"You'll hear from grandparenting expert Dr. Ken Canfield as well as Marcheita Anderson, wife of Arkansas basketball coach Mike Anderson."

From what we've looked up, Ken Canfield professes to be an expert on fatherhood, and seems to believe that male children in particular need male role models in their lives.

It's the next line of their invitation that is the most disturbing, however.

Jim Bob and Michelle Today

"Michelle and I will also share a few insights that we are learning with eight, going on a hundred plus grandchildren. Hope to see you there!"

Basically, they openly admit that they expect their children to follow in their footsteps.

This isn't a surprise, just a troubling reminder.

A lot of parents expect grandchildren, even though their children's decisions about having kids are none of their business.

But expecting to have over 100 children?

Every day, we feel more and more sympathy for the Duggar children.

(Except for Josh)

Jim Bob Duggar and Michelle, Yellowed Out

The event will be free and take place next Saturday.

Some people might wonder what the Duggars are up to if they're hosting a free event.

(Lots of reality stars, especially the ones with small but very vocal fanbases, use events like this one to cash in on people's desire to throw money their way)

There's always a chance that some promotional items like books or merchandise will be promoted at the event.

(Maybe from this Ken Caufield fellow)

For the Duggars, though, this is probably about promoting their beliefs and lifestyle to people like-minded enough to attend.

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Duggar Family Quotes

When you've missed [sex] for seven days, you look forward to it even more! - Michelle Duggar

Anyone can fix him lunch, but only one person can meet that physical need of love that he has, and you always need to be available when he calls. - Michelle Duggar on saying yes (yes, and more yes) to sex