Kendra Caldwell: PREGNANT By Joseph Duggar Before Marriage?!

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Well, it looks like the Duggar family is about to have one more mouth to feed.

But you won't be seeing any gleeful Instagram announcements or reality TV reveals about Joseph Duggar and Kendra Caldwell's forthcoming bundle of joy.

That's because Joseph and Kendra aren't married yet.

In other words, OMG.

Kendra Caldwell, Joseph Duggar

According to the Duggar rules of courtship, they shouldn't even be holding hands, or engaging in full-frontal hugs, much less making babies.

Fans just learned that Joseph and Kendra are courting last week, and now it seems the goal was to rush the young couple to the altar before the public found out.

Didn't happen.

In a blog post on the Duggars' official family website, Joseph takes a contrite tone, admitting to fans that Caldwell is in fact expecting. 

To keep himself from giving into temptation, he employed all of the usual tactics we've learned so much about thanks to the family's TLC shows.

But according to the 22-year-old, a daily regimen of underlining favorite Bible passages and suffering through cold showers just wasn't enough.

Kendra Caldwell and Joseph Duggar

"I have sinned," Joseph wrote, Kendra by his side.

"I mean, I have really sinned like crazy, y'all."

"There were nights that Kendra and I sinned like four or five times in just a couple hours," he said, candidly confessing it wasn't a one-off deal.

How does he justify being such a ... repeat offender?

"Our thinking was you can't put un-ring that bell or put the toothpaste back in the tube, ya know?" Joseph said, and well, we've all been there.

He added that he and Kendra do not yet know the child's gender, but boy or girl, they plan to choose a name with a deeper meaning.

One that reflects the circumstances of its conception:

Joseph Duggar

"If it's a girl, we're thinking Jezebel. If it's a boy, either Cain or Abel, depending on how guilty I feel when I look at him for the first time," he wrote.

"For a middle name, we'll probably go with Revelation or Hellfire."

"Something to remind us of the Lord's eternal wrath."

Despite his candor, and the fact that Joseph says he looks forward to becoming a father, he and Kendra both feel tremendously guilty.

Forsaking their beliefs and disappointing their parents, he says, is not something he takes lightly, nor will he forgive himself anytime soon.

"I try to be like Jesus or Mike Pence in all that I do," he wrote.

Joe Duggar

"I don't eat dinner with women I'm not married to, unless, like, they're prostitutes and I'm trying to talk them out of it or something."

"Yeah, that would work. Anyway, the point is, there's nothing Christ- or Pence-like about what I've done."

Perhaps to add perspective Joseph concluded by noting that things could be much worse:

"I mean, if you think about it, it's not nearly as bad as what Josh did. Y'all remember that stuff?! I can't even believe they let us back on TV ..."

"Whoops. My parents are giving me the 'wrap it up' signal. Bye, y'all! Go Razorbacks!"

We wish Joseph and Kendra all the best, and of course, we'd like to add:

APRIL FOOLS!

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