You can't really blame Lindsay Lohan for trying to reinvent herself.
After all, at this point she's been a Hollywood punchline for much longer than she was a legitimate movie star.
Unfortunately, the new persona she's chosen (Angelina Jolie meets Carmen San Diego-style globe-trotting humanitarian) is one that can't be entered into lightly, and it seems Linds just didn't do her research before the unveiling.
She's like a high school kid who shows up to the first day of sophomore year with a mohawk and a Sex Pistols shirt but still thinks Johnny Rotten is the bad guy from that health class movie about STDs.
Tortured metaphors aside, Linds appears to have jumped into this whole international peacekeeper thing without putting in her due diligence first, which may be how she wound up unwittingly (we think) working as a Turkish spy.
Or writing teary-eyed poems about ISIS.
Or doing engaging of the other misguided BS that she's stumbled into since she decided she wants to convince the world philanthropy is new her new cocaine.
Anyway, when she's not engaged in her other vocation of the moment (trying to get Lohan nightclub off the ground so that the proceeds can go to like ... some charity or something), Lindsay is busy trying to convince the media that she's a force for positive change in the world.
Lohan is in the process of converting to Islam, and she now reportedly sees herself as a bridge between the eastern and western worlds.
But, like, a bridge that used to be famous, ya know?
In a must-read interview with The Daily Mail, Lindsay recently opened up about her religious awakening and how she hopes her new faith won't keep her from meeting with Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin. Seriously.
"It’s a process to convert to anything," Lindsay said of her conversion. "You cant just convert overnight to a religion."
Many have pointed out that you totally can convert to a religion overnight, but the really bonkers part is yet to come.
It seems Lindsay wants to have a sit-down with Trump and his BFF Putin, who are both huge fans of the Islamic faith.
"I want to try to get the word out to Donald Trump bring him over there, have him see all the positive things they are doing over there and all America can do to help as well," Lindsay said when asked about her work in the Middle East.
"He is the president – we have to join him," she insisted. "If you cant beat him, join him."
Linds says - and we can't stress enough that this is not a joke - that she would also like "Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie and Rachel McAdams" to sit in on the conference.
Brad and Angie, eh? We think it's safe to say Linds hasn't been keeping up on the news.
McAdams might seem like a strange choice, but that's Lindsay's way of multi-tasking, as she's still hoping to get that long-rumored Mean Girls sequel going.
We'd say that's a long-shot, but what do we know?
Not too long ago, we would've said a weasel-wigged reality show becoming the leader of the free world was a long shot, too.