This one sure is a doozy, so hang on tight - Rose McGowan, in real life, wrote an essay for The Hollywood Reporter in which she says that walking along a carpet that is red is kind of like a form of rape.
Let that sink in. But not too hard, we wouldn't want you to lose all faith in humanity.
As Rose tells it, "my experience on the red carpet has been a journey of defiance, then one-of-a-kind acquiescence and finally a refusal to play by invented rules passed down through an aged system."
And yeah, that's totally fair.
Also fair is Rose's statement that it's "unlikely" she'll walk a red carpet anytime soon.
If she does, she writes, "I will do my own makeup and dress" because "I'm an adult and I've known how to for a long time."
Good for her or whatever, right?
But Rose starts to lose the plot when she reveals that during her last red carpet extravaganza, she informed the poor soul interviewing her that "it felt like visual rape" when the cameras would zoom in to capture her look.
To put it simply, oh hell no.
You'd really think that, at this point, celebrities would realize how inappropriate it is to compare anything to rape. The concept is sincerely not that difficult to grasp.
So sorry, Rose, but a lot of people just can't bear to muster up the strength to pity you for wearing fancy clothes and accessories and having everyone gush about how pretty you are.
Thankfully, Rose writes that she's "fairly sure" her little quote about rape never aired anywhere. Thank goodness for small miracles.
Now, to be fair to Rose, she's always been passionate about women's rights and battling sexism.
Remember earlier this year when she slammed the hell out of that X-Men: Apocalypse billboard that showed Jennifer Lawrence's character being choked by Apocalypse, a male character?
She called it "offensive and frankly, stupid."
Then back in November of last year, she took issue with Caitlyn Jenner's joke that the "hardest part about being a woman is figuring out what to wear."
Because, as she wrote in an angry Facebook post, "we are more than the stereotypes foisted upon us by people like you."
So while it's clear that Rose's heart is in the right place, she still could really do with a healthy dose of common sense.
Unfortunately, later in Rose's little essay, she writes that "actresses are just brainwashed and part of the machine."
"They don't realize they don't have to be," so it doesn't seem like there's much sense to be had with her these days.
Here's a little tip for Rose: don't refer to every woman in your industry as "brainwashed," and don't - why does this even need to be said? - refer to walking on a damn red carpet as "visual rape."
Like we said - being a decent, reasonable human being is really, really not that difficult a concept.