In a new interview with Rolling Stone, Halsey opens up about a very personal and very painful experience she suffered through last year:
The singer had a miscarriage.
The sensitive subject was broached after Halsey said she read an earlier story by her Rolling Stone interviewer about Planned Parenthood.
This prompted the following confession:
“I felt like I was suffocating reading that article. Like someone put a shopping bag over my head. I didn’t want to meet you at all.
"I was really terrified of you, because I knew as soon as I saw you, I was going to need to tell you that last year on tour I got pregnant.”
This marked the first time Halsey has spoken publicly about the pregnancy.
She admits it was unplanned and that it threw her world into a tailspin.
“What happens? Do I lose my record deal? Do I lose everything? Or do I keep [the pregnancy]?" she says she asked herself, along with questions such as:
"What are the fans going to think? What are the moms going to think? What is the Midwest going to think? What’s f-cking everyone going to think?"
The musician was then in Chicago for a concern when the miscarriage took place.
Amazingly, she STILL performed that evening, giving in to peer pressure and to the importance of the show, as she explained to Rolling Stone:
“I’m like, ‘I have to cancel this show!’ And everyone’s kind of like, ‘Well, it’s Vevo LIFT, and it’s 3 million impressions, so …’ No one knew what to do.”
According to the magazine, “Halsey sent her assistant to the drugstore to buy adult diapers. She put one on, took two Percocet and went to the venue to do her job.”
“It’s the angriest performance that I’ve ever done in my life,” Halsey now says.
“That was the moment of my life where I thought to myself, ‘I don’t feel like a f-cking human being anymore.'
"This thing, this music, Halsey, whatever it is that I’m doing, took precedence and priority over every decision that I made regarding this entire situation from the moment I found out until the moment it went wrong.
"I walked offstage and went into the parking lot and just started throwing up.”
Halsey went on to admit she blamed herself for losing the baby.
She had been living a whirlwind lifestyle and it caught up to her in the worst way possible.
"I wasn’t drinking. I wasn’t doing drugs," she clarifies, adding:
"I was f-cking overworked - in the hospital every couple of weeks because I was dehydrated, needing bags of IVs brought to my green room. I was anemic, I was fainting.
"My body just broke the f-ck down.”
The honestly of the interview has led “#proudofhasley” to grow into a trending topic on Twitter.
Fans around the world are using it to thank the artist for her candid take on a terrible situation; and also to show appreciation for her career.
“I want to be a mom more than I want to be a pop star. More than I want to be anything in the world,” Halsey concluded.
We send her our best wishes and we join the growing chorus of social media admirers who appreciate Halsey's brutal honesty.
We hope she hangs in there.