Sofia Vergara: My Boobs Are Everywhere! I Don't Want to Look Like an Old Stripper!

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Sofia Vergara is one funny, talented lady. Her wit and talent have earned her multiple Emmy and Golden Globe nominations and she is a significant part of what has made Modern Family such a tremendous success.

Oh, and she's got a great rack, too.

Sofia Vergara

A sizeable one, at least. It's kind of hard to ignore, and apparently is isn't easy to live with, either.

"I’ve got the boobs of a stripper,” Vergara said in an interview with The Edit. “They’re a 32DDD and because they’re real, they’re everywhere, so I need my dresses to have structure — and under armor. There is so much going on under my dresses that I bleed at the end of award ceremonies.”

Hot damn! She bleeds? And I complain when the underwire of my six-year-old bra breaks through and pokes me in the ribs.

(Honestly, beauty can be a real pain in the arse.)

“In 10 years I think it would be good to have a reduction," she added. "I don’t think it’s even going to be an option not to [have surgery], because I’m going to start having back pains." 

"I wouldn’t make them too small — just enough that I don’t end up looking like an old stripper.”

What an amazing ad campaign for breast reduction surgery: "Don't look like an old stripper! Downsize with Dr. Encino!"

Sofia could get some advice from her young co-star Ariel Winter, who just underwent breast reduction surgery last year. She said her oversized chest caused back pain and made her feel unhappy and self-conscious.

Sounds like our Columbian comedic actress isn't quite there yet, so for now we hope she has plenty of Band-Aids on hand.

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