The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 6 Episode 1 Recap: Life's a Pitch

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The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are back, and if Tuesday's premiere is any indication, this season - and cast - promises to be as over the top as ever.

Particularly if your last name happens to be Richards.

On The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Season 6 Episode 1, Kyle Richards tried on a pair of $75,000 sunglasses (didn't she mock Dana Wilkey for a pair that were $50,000 less?) at her "store," then popped over to Villa Blanca some iced tea and sh-- talk.

Meanwhile, Yolanda Foster is bed-ridden in a high-rise condo, surrounded by IV drips and medication.  

Foster had been diagnosed with Lyme disease three years ago, and her condition has continued to deteriorate.  Moving to her husband's LA condo made sense, since she had to be nearer to hospitals and treatment centers.

Prior to last night's premiere, Foster and her husband David announced that they were splitting after four years of marriage.   Taping had reportedly wrapped prior to the news, but viewers will most likely be looking for signs of strain throughout this season.

While Foster was being treated, Lisa Vanderpump and Richards talked casually about their cast mate's condition.

Yeah she's sick, but I've texted her and she keeps blowing me off, Vanderpump bitched.

It's because she's sick. 

Richards, obviously fresh off a Real Housewives of Orange County binge, inquires about Foster's diagnosis.  

What does it really mean?  Does she actually have Lyme disease.

I should have turned off the TV at that point, but I didn't because there's obviously something wrong with me.

Talk turns to business, and Richards revealed that she's developing a scripted series based on her life as a child actress (vomit).  It appears that her older sister, Kathy Hilton does not want their family's dirty laundry aired, but guess who doesn't care? 

Richards is going to get hers, and that's that.  Being famous is awesome, and she's come a long way from being "Paris Hilton's aunt" on E! True Hollywood Story: The Hilton Sisters.

Watching Eileen Davis prep for her scenes on The Young & The Restless was such a lovely diversion; she memorizes her lines on a stationary bike, gets her hair and makeup done while reminiscing about love triangles past.  What a treat.

I did not know that Davis' father-in-law was Dick Van Patten.  That guy was awesome.  

Good on Lisa Rinna for being featured on Oprah's Where Are They Now?

I do have a question, though.  Rinna's been around for awhile.  It's not like she was on some hugely popular 90s series, fell of the face of the earth and was then recently resurfaced.

Rinna already has one season of RHOBH under her belt.  I would have been more surprised had Jake Ryan from 16 Candles been selected.

Anyhoo, Rinna is adorably candid and seems pretty genuine, considering her vocation.

The dinner party she threw for her birthday was tame, by Housewives standards.  Foster was able to make it out for a spell, but never mind that.  

Foster's face was makeup-free, something Richards felt was worthy of a dig.

While Rinna applauded Foster for getting up, getting dressed and stepping out, Richards was slightly horrified that any Beverly Hills housewife would deign to open their front door looking a fright. 

"I'm not used to seeing Yolanda go out without a stitch of makeup on," Richards told the camera.

"In Beverly Hills, a woman going out to a birthday without one drop of makeup on ... is borderline shocking."

This wasn't followed by, "I think what she did was brave" or "good for her."  That was it.

Ken Todd said more than once that he thought Foster looked like sh--.

Vanderpump couldn't believe Foster didn't even have the energy to put on some under-eye concealer, suggesting that she take "ten seconds" to pretty up a bit.

THE WOMAN IS WEAK AND BATTLING LYME DISEASE.  

Richards is still upset with her sister, Kim.

Whatever.  Those two need to take their problems off-camera.    

What did you think of the premiere? Follow the link to watch The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills online, and leave your comments about last night's episode below.  

As far as I'm concerned, things are not off to a great start.

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