Valeria Lukyanova to Perez Hilton: Get a Boob Job!

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Human Barbie Valeria Lukyanova is back and more bizarre than ever, turning her sights on one of her high-profile critics: Perez Hilton.

The Ukrainian, doll-like enigma famous for her unusual diets, eye-popping photos and truly absurd commentary, lashed out at Perez.

Why? Because Hilton implied Lukyanova was a hypocrite for hating on the "Human Barbie" nickname that "literally made her famous."

(This was June when he wrote that.)

Naturally, HuBarb responded by posting a lengthy personal attack beneath side-by-side Valeria Lukyanova photos and Perez photos.

Adding the words "Natural Sporty" and "Natural Awkward" (above), she defended herself from his attacks ... and called him "ugly."

Not that it would change her asinine point (whatever it may be), but Perez has lost a ton of weight and is super cut nowadays. Anyway.

"This is funny coming from a man who looks like clown," she writes. "It [amazes] me how people with the weirdest bodies are so full of themselves."

So basically, the woman who aspires to look as "perfect" as a Barbie Doll hates when you call her that, especially if you're uggers.

"Before you decide to broadcast your naked torso," Valeria adds of Perez, "you should probably make sure you are nice to look at."

She then suggests Hilton get a "boob job."

Lukyanova then takes a shot at "Human Ken" Justin Jedlica, another critic of hers, calling him a "lost case" who "simply [looks] awful."

"Such characters as Justin and Perez make their names by publicly offending famous people like me," Lukyanova laments, concluding:

"Ok well, here goes my PR to them and may they enjoy eating crumbs from the master’s table."

Well, that about sums it up. We have no idea what that even means to be honest ... but well handled, Valeria. Well handled indeed.

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Valeria Lukyanova Quotes

What would you keep children for? So they can get you a glass of water when you're on your deathbed?

The very idea of having children brings out this deep revulsion in me.