by Hilton Hater at

In 2008, Tom Cruise tried to become a box office star again by starring in a drama (Valkyrie) based around Hitler and the Nazis. Bad idea.

A couple years later, the slightly insane movie star has come up with a far more effective plan: appear in a MTV Movie Awards promo with Robert Pattinson.

In the hilarious video below, Cruise takes on the persona of Len Grossman, the foul-mouthed Hollywood producer he portrayed in Tropic Thunder.

When the Twilight Saga stud informs Grossman that he might actually wash hair for the MTV event, Grossman goes off on him, screaming:

"Your filthy hair made you a star! Your filthy hair sent my fat-*ss kid to Space Camp four times!"

It's great stuff. Watch now:

Continue Reading...

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by Free Britney at

Past and present co-stars Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz are among the first presenters announced for this year's MTV Movie Awards, according to reports.

We haven't seen Mr. Crazy Pants in awhile, so that should be exciting. Hopefully there's a couch for him to jump on ... or a montage of Suri Cruise photos.

The actors will be joined on the celebrity telecast by Diddy, who is also a confirmed presenter. All this should make for an exciting, star-studded evening.

In addition, MTV has announced three new categories in this year's show: Biggest Bad-Ass Star; Best Scared-As-S--- Performance and Global Superstar.

Tom and Cameron

Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz on the set of Knight and Day.

For the first time, fans abroad will also have the chance to vote in the latter category by visiting their local MTV sites. North American fans can vote for their favorite nominees in all the categories beginning May 12 through June 5.

This year's MTV Movie Awards will be hosted by Aziz Ansari (known for some of the funniest Parks and Recreation quotes) and will air live on June 6 at 9 p.m.

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by Free Britney at

This is one of our favorite recycled stories in Hollywood.

If you've got nothin' some week and you've got magazines to print, this one's in the ol' "In Case of Emergency, Break Open Celebrity Gossip Glass" Vault.

For Star, this moment came for the second time in under two months. In early March, they ran an "expose" on Katie Holmes being held against her will.

This week, it's about her "tortured life" and why "she can never leave Tom." Why can't she? We haven't read the full made-up story, but we have theories:

  1. She actually loves family life with Tom and Suri Cruise.
  2. Money.

Yup, that about covers it. We look forward to reading the June edition, guys. Keep up the good work ... and look how miserable she looks in this old pic!

THERE IS NO ESCAPE: The clutches of Tom Cruise? Unbreakable.

To illustrate the hilarity of how frequently and blatantly the tabloids run with this one, click to enlarge past renditions of this classic gossip fable (although sometimes they decide to mix things up and make her pregnant instead):

  • Tighten That Leash
  • Katie Holmes: Prisoner?
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by Free Britney at

Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise are so damn baby crazy, the couple is toying with the idea of having another one sometime between now and when they die.

That's all the cover story in OK! Magazine actually says, despite the implications of the cover posted below. AT LAST ... a completely manufactured non-story!

Seriously, did they furlough their entire staff? We know times are hard, but come on, we expect more from scribes at this fine celebrity gossip publication.

Really guys? That's all you got this week?

Baby Brother For Suri!

BEST NEWS EVER: And worst magazine cover.

What is true is that Suri Cruise is about to turn four. Her parents have "surprising news" in store, OK! claims, and that is that they may want another baby.

Someday. Here's the direct quote:

"A friend of the couple adds that despite already having an adopted son (Connor Cruise), Tom might like to have a biological son to pass on the gene pool."

Wow, he might like that? Enthralling. We can't wait to read about those possible desires and the Scientology regimen Katie must endure before conceiving.

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by Free Britney at

It's been awhile, but Star, In Touch, OK! and their ilk decided to give Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie the week off as the subject of myriad ridiculous tabloid covers.

Taking Brangelina's place in the first of the aforementioned celebrity gossip rags? A rare TomKat sighting! It's like some editor just remembered that they exist!

We haven't seen a good story about Katie Holmes being trapped in Tom Cruise's evil clutches in forever (well, December), but this one makes up for lost time!

In addition to insinuating that Tom got her pregnant with baby #2 (which he is supposedly willing to give her $75 million for), Star says that Katie Holmes:

  • Is getting "prenatal Scientology lessons (whatever that consists of)
  • Is going through "agonizing" detox (of what, who the frick knows)
  • Is having her "leash tightened" (yes, they just likened her to a dog)
Tighten That Leash

PRISON WITHOUT BARS: For Katie Holmes, there is no escape.

For someone supposedly under intense mind control and chained in Tom Cruise's torture dungeon, Katie seems awfully content, albeit a little frumpy lately.

Katie and Tom first got together in 2005. Suri Cruise is thriving and cute. Everyone seems status quo and happy. Could it be that TomKat isn't that abnormal?

That, or the perks of being married to Tom must be really good.

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by Free Britney at

Michael Davis Sapir claims that actor Tom Cruise, attorney Bert Fields and infamous jailed private investigator Anthony Pellicano conspired to spy on him.

He says they illegally wiretapped his phone ... why would they do that?

Happily Married

There is a bit of history between Tom Cruise and Michael Davis Sapir.

In 2001, Cruise sued Sapir for $100 million after he claimed video of Cruise "engaged in a homosexual relationship." That lawsuit settled later that year.

Both parties issued a statement saying that no such tape existed.

Tom Cruise is a wild man. But a spy?

In the latest suit, filed Friday in L.A. County Superior Court, Sapir claims Pellicano illegally wiretapped his phone during the time of the 2001 lawsuit.

Sapir claims in the suit that Cruise, Fields and Pellicano were all privy to what was going on, and is currently suing the actor for $5 million, minimum.

Bert Fields says they did not even hire Pellicano to work on the Sapir case.

There was no comment from Cruise's rep. Pellicano? Well, he's in jail.

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by Free Britney at

Another week, another great tabloid cover from OK!

We haven't heard a whole lot from Katie Holmes in awhile, probably because she's been let out of her cage long enough to do some of her own projects.

Meanwhile, her husband, Tom Cruise, is overseas filming the action-romance Knight & Day with Cameron Diaz. Is the separation hurting their marriage?

Rumors that the couple, who celebrated their three-year anniversary November 18, have separated because of marital tensions are running rampant.

On the contrary, though, OK! can exclusively make up report that Tom and Katie reached a deal on expanding their family: for $75 million, she'll do it!!

New Marriage Deal!

In other news, Tiger Woods apparently "reveals what really happened" in this issue. We doubt it, unless they mean how he lost the PGA Championship to Y.E. Yang.

While right now work is Katie's first priority, which Tom doesn’t agree with, she plans to get pregnant "sometime in the next year." And in return?

Well, she becomes $75 million more "vested" in Tom's fortune. Talk about a romantic offer. Wonder how much she got for creating Suri Cruise.

Part of the reason for Katie's independent streak? She wants to feel like an equal partner in the marriage for once, not just the wife of a megastar.

“She no longer feels like she’s just Mrs. Cruise. She’s her own person again,” a pal tells OK! of the couple’s decision. “She and Tom have their disagreements, but deep down they love each other very much. That’s what is important.”

That and creating celebrity gossip "news" like this.

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by Free Britney at

Tom Cruise is bonkers.

There's really no other way we can put it. He jumps on couches. He gets married a lot. He shares his bizarre opinions on all sorts of political and social issues.

Regardless, he remains one of Hollywood's biggest stars, having starred in hits from A Few Good Men and Risky Business to Jerry Maguire and Tropic Thunder.

More importantly, for all his wackiness, Tom Cruise is basically harmless and seems like he cares about being a good dad to his kids (Isabella Cruise, Connor Cruise and little Suri Cruise) more than anything. Which is what really matters in the end.

So cheers to you, Mr. Katie Holmes, on your 47th birthday today. We hope it's one to remember. Click to enlarge some classic Tom Cruise pictures below ...

  • Dressed For the Weather
  • Tom and Connor
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by Free Britney at

Last night, Carmelo Anthony scored 34 points as the Denver Nuggets evened their series with the Los Angeles Lakers with a 106-103 win in Game Two.

It was a tough loss, but Kobe Bryant and the Lake Show remain the #1 game in town. Here's Tom Cruise and son Connor Cruise at last night's game:

CRUISE CONTROL: Tom and Connor are locked in on NBA action.

While Los Angeles' pro baseball team has been making a strong case of late (check out our gallery of celebrity Dodger fans), L.A. Lakers games at Staples Center remain the hottest sports spot for celebrities from A-List to Spencer Pratt.

Click to enlarge pictures of stars showing their L.A. Lakers love:

  • Hooray For The Home Team
  • Samuel L. Jackson Picture
  • Prince and Girlfriend
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by Free Britney at

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes take education very seriously so much so that they have reportedly doled out a whopping $1 million on classes for their kid.

This wouldn't be as incredible if Suri Cruise weren't two.

According to Showbizspy, Cruise and his wife are keen for the cute little tyke to have a well-rounded upbringing, and are spending a fortune to make it so.

A source reveals:

"It doesn't matter what [Suri Cruise] is doing, Tom wants her to be better than any other child. All parents think their kids are special, but Suri is learning the ways of Xenu French and Spanish and has a tutor she sees once a week."

TomKat in Tokyo

One happy, overachieving family.

"Suri has shown a real love of Scientology dancing, so Tom and Katie are encouraging her. She practices ballet, tap and modern dance for hours, nearly every day. She also started taking private gymnastics lessons and is learning soccer."

Katie Holmes is convinced that socializing with older kids will benefit her daughter:

"Katie likes to have Victoria and David Beckham's two sons around, since they are older. She thinks Suri will emulate what they do and learn faster."

Aww. So sweet. Click to enlarge some cute Suri and TomKat pics ...

  • Suri and Tom Cruise Pic
  • Disney Princess
  • Dressed For the Weather
  • Waving to the Fans
  • That Hat Sucks
  • Suri and Bear Go Holiday Shopping
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