Suri Cruise

Yes, the youngest-ever Vanity Fair cover star celebrates the big "1″ today.

Crazy to think that it's been a full year since she was birthed by crazy Katie Holmes. It brings a tear to The Hollywood Gossip's eye.

Not since Howard Hughes has a celebrity so successfully combined fame and reclusiveness like Tom and Katie's little Asian baby, Suri Cruise. 

Representatives for TomKat are releasing no plans of birthday preparations.

However, sources say this celebrity baby birthday is likely to be celebrated in Shreveport, La., where Katie is filming her new movie Mad Money with Diane Keaton and Queen Latifah.

It's her first film since she began her relationship with Tom Cruise.

Rumor has it he's already on his way down there, to celebrate the big day and to make sure his wrongfully imprisoned bride is under his command.

"She is already down there, and Tom and Suri will be flying in," says our source, who did not say just how short Katie's leash is.

In a change of PR reps, Holmes, the possible unnamed subject of a new novel, recently retained West Coast powerhouse Ina Treciokas as her spokeswoman.

"It's part of a plan to normalize the PR, to get it back to what it was before Tom freaked out," says another insider.

"They realize the problems all began when Tom hired his Scientology sister Lee Anne [DeVette] to run the show."

Who's got more St. Patrick's Day spirit? Is it our favorite cute little Asian baby, or the hunky British actor who steals every scene of Lord of the Rings and Pirates of the Caribbean? 

At left, we see Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, a.k.a. TomKat, along with their cute 11-month-old daughter, Suri Cruise, getting into the spirit of St. Patrick's Day as they attend the basketball game of Tom's son, Connor Cruise, in Beverly Hills.

At right, we have Orlando Bloom. Not a very original outfit, dude. But hey, at least it's festive. And he's also dated, or been linked to, a number of hot chicks, such as Kate Bosworth and recently Kirsten Dunst, so what does he care?

Who's got better St. Pat's fashion sense? You tell us.

Are Tom Cruise and his brainwashed, submissive, mute, formerly hot wife expecting yet another visit from the stork in the near future?

According to TMZ, a TomKat confidante went to trendy West Hollywood baby boutique Petit Tresor last week, looking for four "scenarios" for a boy's nursery.

The friend of Cruise and Katie Holmes was overheard saying:

"We want to be prepared for a baby boy."

Awesome.

We're told the interested themes for unnamed baby boy's room were: sports, nursery rhyme, Scientology, cartoon and the color blue.

Just kidding about the middle one. What would that consist of, though? A bunch of aliens landing and populating the planet and jumping on couches, probably.

Anyway. The estimated cost for an eggshell, blue-themed room alone is a steep $45,000 - but includes a custom-made blue and white antique crib, blue bedding and blue walls with floating clouds, so it's so worth it.

Well, if you're having an alien baby, anyway. Personally, we'd save our money for more important things. Like a Lauren Conrad-inspired wardrobe.

Moving on. The shop was also given a deadline of April 15, three days before little Asian cutie Suri Cruise's first birthday, to come up with the designs.

If the Cruises are expecting a little brother for Suri in the near future, the question is: Is Katie Holmes already preggers, or will said boy arrive via a Third World shopping spree?

Regardless of whether Katie is knocked up like Bridget Moynahan or hunting for an adopted child abroad like Brangelina, the bottom line remains the same:

TomKat is just plain strange.

The picture below might as well be titled "Portrait of a Very Happy, Slightly Insane, Scientology-practicing Family."

With a bottle and toys in hand, Tom Cruise and his beautiful, brainwashed bride, Katie Holmes, are looking prepared to take their 10-month-old daughter to her big brother's basketball game in Beverly Hills on Sunday.

If they weren't such lunatics, we'd say this picture is almost cute...

No word yet on whether Connor Cruise's team won the game, or whether that little Asian cutie, Suri Cruise, was vocal in cheering him on.

That's really not important, though. We're just glad to see that TomKat is keeping busy in light of the unsettling injury to BFF David Beckham.

The life of adorable, Asian, jet-setting celebrity babies is never uneventful. It sometimes means crazy napping... and serious staring contests!

We'd have to say the youngest member of the family wins this round - at least in terms of cuteness, anyway. The media caught up with the spawn of Tom Cruise at LAX, with her mom and grandma. This is one intense pic:

PHOTO CREDIT: Bauer-Griffin

No word on where the elusive little Suri Cruise and that brainwashed little Katie Holmes were coming from, but the trio seen here sure looks ready for some rest and relaxation. Or perhaps a Scientology seminar. Those are always a ton of fun.

Welcome to the ultimate cuteness showdown. As the year draws to a close, we thought you might enjoy a photo comparison of three of the sweetest humans to join the population in 2006. Talk about a toss-up! We present TomKat spawn Suri Cruise (left), Gwen Stefani's son Kingston James McGregor Rossdale (center) and Brangelina product Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt (right) with her mother.

Three babies. 10 names. Infinite cuddliness. Who would you rather spend time with if you had the chance? It's a complete toss-up as far as T.H. Gossip is concerned, but we will say this much: There is absolutely no way in hell that Tom Cruise is Suri's biological dad. Look at that little Asian cutie! Something's up here.

A romantic honeymoon in the Republic of Maldives ended this morning for Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, who took their precious baggage to the airport. They also brought along their cute little Asian baby, Suri Cruise.

The family was reportedly heading home on Cruise's private jet. Much as we love bashing TomKat, we have to say that this impromptu family portrait is awfully cute. Except for the fact that Katie looks topless and like she's a zombie possessed and controlled by Scientology operatives. Sorry, couldn't resist. Loons.

Believe it. Suri Cruise, the reclusive little Asian baby, made a surprise, rare public appearance with her mother, Katie Holmes, and her dad, Tom Cruise, at City Hall in Rome. She looks tired. Probably from watching Tom run around the house like a loon and jumping on furniture every day. The guy is straight up insane. Anyway, here are the Suri pics:

TomKat is now making preparations to get married Saturday in Rome, after Katie's parents reportedly a hissy fit that the couple planned on getting hitched at a Scientology church. Amazing. We can't imagine why they'd object to her being brainwashed by a cult. Or buying a $340 thong. These things make perfect sense.

In honor of Halloween, and autumn in general, here are a couple of fall-themed pictures we came across while scouring the Internets for Gossip. Feast your eyes on these puppies:

On the left, we see a Suri Cruise pumpkin. So cute and innocent. The Asian-looking spawn of TomKat is captured really nicely in this jack-o-lantern, we have to admit. Apologies to the creator of this piece if it is actually intended to be Bjork -- hope you can understand the confusion.

On the right, we have a pumpkin carved in the likeness of Lindsay Lohan... after a long night of partying. Yes, this is as accurate a depiction of the drugged-up skank as one could hope for. The only thing missing is a pumpkin of Rumer Willis by her side and rushing to clean up the vomit. Gotta love having a personal bitch assistant.

Special thanks to one of our readers, who we shall call Kerri, for this suggestion. Our celebrity look-alikes aren't always on the mark -- sometimes, such as in the case of Tom Cruise and Kim Jong Il, they're really more for laughs than any sort of serious comparison. But we think this pair of look-alikes is particularly solid. At least as far as six-month old celebrity babies and Icelandic pop singers go.

Yes, that is little Suri Cruise (left), and the amazing Bjork. Despite turning 41 later this year, we think Bjork is a dead-ringer for the spawn of TomKat.