Suri Cruise

We're going on three and a half months since the supposed birth of Suri Cruise, and the shroud of secrecy has yet to be lifted.

No pictured have surfaced of the daughter of insane actor Tom Cruise and his younger, rough-looking fiancee Katie Holmes, allegedly brought into this cruel world April 18. Some celebrities claim to have seen her, but no one believes Leah Remini and/or Jada Pinkett Smith. Or that other chick named Cruz. Come on.

To some, this has become a holdout of staggering proportions. Some, T.H. Gossip included, have come to think of it as a conspiracy. Clearly, if you look at the results of our POLL (above, right), we're not the only ones.

The whereabouts of baby Suri has become so hotly debated that some columnists are calling her the Loch Ness Monster (right).

Just the same, TomKat insists that pics of Suri will be released shortly, according to a spokesman.

One rumor regarding the little one's absence from the public eye is that her photos didn't get high enough bids on the open market. Another is that her protective pop is worried about kidnapping threats. His spokesman is quick to deny that buzz, however, and even denies that Cruise is reluctant to show Suri at all.

"He hasn't been reluctant," spokesman Arnold Robinson said. "They will be making a decision to release the photographs [of Suri] shortly."

MSNBC asked whether the pics be released to a single or a select few media outlets, or whether it will be a general release.

"That's part of the decision they'll be making shortly," he said.

After stating late last week that she has seen Suri Cruise, Penelope Cruz has since done a complete 180 and is refusing to talk about the baby anymore.

"I'm not going to talk about that anymore. I answered that yesterday and I'm not going to talk about it in detail because I really protect the people that I love," Cruz said of Cruise.

Cruz, who dated Tom Cruise for three years following their horrendous film together (Vanilla Sky) said Thursday the supposed evil spawn of TomKat was not only real, but one of the most beautiful babies she'd ever seen in her whole life.

But in her most recent interview, Penelope called her outburst of Suri details a lapse in judgment, and refused additional comment.

"It's important to keep living life as an observer and not just feel like you're being the thing observed because then you start looking at yourself from the outside instead of really alert... I forget people are looking at me in a situation like that, like yesterday," she said.

She also forgets, apparently, that Suri is not real. Just look at the poll, people! The fans have spoken. Please vote (above, right) if you haven't already! Tell us what you think!

Move over Leah Remini.

Step aside, Jada Pinkett Smith.

Believe it or not, there's been another alleged Suri Cruise sighting.

Penelope Cruz, the 32-year-old Spanish actress who used to date Tom Cruise, says she, too, has laid eyes on his possibly fictitious baby daughter. Cruz did not offer many details of the meeting, but praised little Suri as a special baby.

"She's really beautiful. She's one of the most beautiful babies I've ever seen," the actress said in London, where she was attending the premiere of her new movie, Volver.

Suri was allegedly born to Cruise and his fiancee, Katie Holmes, in Los Angeles on April 18. She has yet to be seen in public, leading many to question whether she is even real.

The Spanish actress, who co-starred with Tom in 2001's absolutely awful Vanilla Sky, and also dated him for three years thereafter, wouldn't give any more details about the unveiling. Possibly because there is no baby, and Cruise is getting everyone he knows to lie for him -- even stooping so low as to beg his ex-girlfriend. But that's just the Gossip's humble opinion.

Again, we call upon the fans. Tell us what you believe in our poll (top right). Is Suri Cruise a farce, or just being protected by private parental units? This is your chance to weigh in. At the time of this blog, 335 of you have spoken... and the results speak volumes.

Does Suri Cruise actually exist, or is this all a well-orchestrated publicity stunt? Given the dearth of evidence to support a conspiracy, such as a bogus birth certificate and some very fake-looking pictures of alleged mom Katie Holmes, we are convinced there is no baby. But do fans across the nation share our opinion, or are we going out of our minds? That's precisely what the Gossip wanted to find out with our EXCLUSIVE POLL (above, right).

As of the time of this post, 231 of you have voted, with 58 PERCENT believing that there is no baby. If you have not cast your vote yet, please do so, as we can gauge the general population's opinion more accurately with a larger sample size! There appears to be widespread belief that this is all a hoax, or at least very suspicious.

Below is a sampling of some reader comments we've gotten re: Suri. Some of them may surprise you. Others may offend you. All are pretty much guaranteed to amuse you:

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"Suri?!? More like surreal! No way this kid exists." -- Amanda

"Wow, that picture looks totally fake... if she really WAS that big, then her stomach should be much lower. I know everyone carries differently but come one... also, there is no possible way to be wearing regular jeans when you are that big. Well, I suppose there is but it is SOOO uncomfortable." -- Teresa

"I believe she's real. Why she would stay hidden all this time is weird though." -- V

"There is no way that a woman's stomach can appear as Katie's does in this [sic] pix. It does not look real, and even though my teen tried to tell me, I am now convinced that Suri is fake also. Shame on TomKat if it's not true." -- Missy

"OK, well... I have actually believed that there really was a baby. But... either there was some doctring [sic] to this pic or that is a totally fake tummy. I've had 2 kids and all my friends have too, and I have NEVER seen something as freaky as that! lol" -- Katherine

"Here's the REAL question: which is more real - Suri Cruise or Ashlee Simpson's chin? At least we've seen a picture of Ashlee's chin." -- Allen

"I honestly believe that Suri Cruise is fake. I love Leah Remini but i think that Tomkat asked her to say that they saw her just so people wouldnt catch on to Suri not being real." -- CoJo

"I CAN'T WAIT TILL EITHER TOM OR KATIE COME CLEAN & TELL THE PUBLIC IT WAS ALL FOR PUBLICITY & THERE NEVER WAS ANY 'BABY'!!!" -- Barbara

"ya know - who cares - I was a huge Tom fan from the early 1980's - after he totally dissed Nicole Kiddman [sic], I could care less about him, who he is currently bedding nor his freaky alledged [sic] child - don't care!" -- DeeCee

"I don't get it - we criticize celebrities so often for being in the spotlight too much. Now, we have a loving couple choosing to keep their baby and private life private … and we make fun of them for it? What does that say about our society? Our need to be nosy?" -- Donna

"Suri is real and she's almost 8 months old; born last December, daddy unknown. Remember Katie got really big really quickly?! She was '3' months and looked like 8 -- and don't forget Katie is tall... tall women usually hide the bump well. And did anyone actually believe the whirlwind romance in the first place? But these guys are supposed to be actors -- you really think they could have done a better job -- stoopid heads! Neither of them have ever really struck me as mental giants -- which might explain why the bump kept changing size. The real question is... why did they bother in the first place? We'll see Suri when she's too old to tell the difference -- e.g. 'is this a 12 or a 16 month baby?'" -- Claire

We would love to post a picture of Suri Cruise here today, on this, the 100th day after she was supposedly born. But since she isn't real, you'll have to settle for an ordinary pic of plain ol' TomKat. Sorry! What is your opinion of the alleged baby? Is she real, or the total farce / PR stunt we believe her to be? Leave us a comment or vote in our poll (above).

First, Leah Remini. Now, Jada Pinkett Smith. The list of people who claim to have seen Suri Cruise has reached a whopping two.

She's one of the sweetest babies I've ever met in my life," Pinkett Smith said, according to hollyscoop.com. "She's an absolute beauty and she's Daddy's little girl."

Come on now. Doesn't anyone else find it interesting how these supposedly close friends of Tom Cruise are saying how great the baby is and blah blah blah, yet for some reason, there are no pictures of them visiting TomKat?

With photographers taking up residence in the bushes, for God's sake, how would freaking Will and Jada Pinkett Smith go unnoticed visiting Cruise's mansion? This is getting awfully weird, indeed.

TELL US WHAT YOU THINK.

Is Suri real or a complete sham? Leave a comment on this post by clicking below, and be sure to vote in our poll (top right).

One is already being trained to save the world, while the other may or may not exist. Both Shiloh Jolie-Pitt and Suri Cruise will be kept warm this winter, however.

Swedish knitwear designer, Suss Cousins, has given Tinseltown's two most famous toddlers her gift of the yarn. Let's first take a look at Shiloh's new sweater, an outfit that features this newborn's face alongside Zahara, the adopted child of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt:

Next, we have Suri's personalized present. The Gossip can only assume the "S" on front stands for "Scientology," "Sham" or, perhaps, "Scientology sham."

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have not been hiding three-month old baby Suri from all their friends. So says Leah Remini, star of CBS' hit comedy The King of Queens, who has reportedly seen the mystery baby.

"She's a newborn and normal size!" Remini gushed. "Tom and Kate... want to have a life and raise their baby. They're normal parents. [Katie] is the most serene, gracious, sweet human being."

Remini, 36, also claims to have bought Suri shoes. Talk about a waste of money. Why? Because this "sighting" proves nothing. Suri Cruise does not exist, people, and sooner or later, the cover-up will be exposed and people will realize that this is all an incredible sham.

NEWS FLASH: Remini is, like Cruise, is all into that Scientology garbage.

These people are complete lunatics who have no qualms about lying for one another and brainwashing new members. Leah also had a recurring role on Saved By The Bell back in the day. Relevance to this blog? Zero. But she's still a publicity-hogging liar, and until we see Suri pics, we are not buying any of this crap. So there.

Lo and behold, it appears Suri Cruise may actually exist.

Or does she? The Gossip isn't so sure. While no pictures have yet been released of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' love child, her birth certificate has been posted online by TMZ.com. But the document may actually raise more questions than it clears up. It was filed on May 8, 2006, nearly a month after the baby Cruise was supposedly born on April 18.

The official policy of St John's Hospital, where Holmes gave birth, is to file birth certificates within a week of the birth.

According to a hospital official, this delay was caused by the fact that neither of the parents, nor a representative of the parents, signed the necessary document certifying the birth. That person, whose signature is illegible and who is labelled a "friend of the couple," arrived on May 4. It is not known whether said friend was present at the birth, or if said friend is a certifiably insane, couch-jumping lunatic like Cruise.

One thing is for sure, though, which is that the "Attendant or Certifier" of the document was not present. Anne Heffernan, who inked the certificate in that capacity, wasn't in the delivery room at the time and didn't see Suri either. However, a hospital representative says this is standard practice, and that Heffernan is authorised to sign the document if no doctor is available, even if "normally, the doctor signs."

Suri has been unseen since her birth, with no official photo spreads or paparazzi shots. It has however been reported that Cruise was offered several million for photos of his newest child, but determined that the money was not substantial enough, or objected based on his nutcase Scientology beliefs, depending on what you read.

Suri Cruise was a much anticipated baby, so when no pictures of her surfaced, questions were bound to be asked. Immediately after Suri's birth in April, it was proclaimed that she is "extremely beautiful, has lots of dark hair and big blue eyes" and that proud father Tom Cruise was going to show pictures of his child with Katie Holmes (below) on the May 12 episode of Ellen.

But there have been no pics.

Some have speculated that Tom wanted more money than the $3 million he was reportedly offered for the rights to Suri pics. Brangelina reportedly got a cool $4M for whoring out Shiloh, and Tom wanted to be in that league or he wasn't about to play ball. Or so the theory goes.

But now, a source close to Cruise offers a new theory: that the lack of pictures is simply another by-product of the star's insane Scientology beliefs.

"Tom insists he'll do it in his own time. He won't be bullied into showing his world his precious angel. Tom wants to obey Scientology rules about keeping babies out of the public eye," an alleged friend of Cruise's told Grazia magazine.

According to Scientology doctrine, parents should avoid taking newborn babies out unless absolutely necessary. As Cruise is an avid follower of the sect, perhaps he is merely adhering to his beliefs and is not the money-grubbing lunatic we thought he was. Well, at least not the money-grubbing part.

Cruise's friend did not comment on whether Scientology permits naked, pregnant pictures of the baby's mother to be released to the public (please see a very interesting, recent Britney Spears nude photo spread), but that's neither here nor there.