Spencer Pratt

Boobs. Nose. Bikini photos. Engagement.

Looks like everything about Heidi Montag is fake!

It's not altogether shocking, as recent cutesy pictures of the two of them hardly look natural, but a new report verifies that the pics of Montag and her "fiance" Spencer Pratt - as well as their engagement - are contrived.

Moreover, the couple is profiting handsomely. Which is ironic, in a way, as it's the only thing handsome about them. That Spencer Pratt is one ugly son of a ...

Anyway. In a case of one celebrity gossip source spying on another, audio and video evidence has surfaced of the "set up" The Hills couple is doing to make themselves household names.

"They won't be walking down the aisle," says an insider. "But they will go through the motions of planning a wedding, then have a big break-up that will get lots of press. All caught on camera by photographers, of course."

Wow. And we thought Heidi ditching Lauren Conrad as a friend, then clinging back on to her when the cameras started to roll again was shameless.

Follow this link for the full story of the supposedly fabricated engagement and more pictures of Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt ...

It was only a matter of time.

Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag, whose engagement has been public for all of 18 hours or so, were amazingly spotted frolicking in a swimming pool and acting all cute for the cameras.

Funny how these Heidi and Spencer pics seem to just pop up whenever the slimy wannabe star feels like he wants to be in the news. Her fake boobs are something else, don't get us wrong - but the onslaught of staged photos makes us nauseous.

We're sure you know the feeling. So take a minute to enjoy, and be disgusted by this latest "spontaneous" photo shoot featuring the stars of MTV's smash, The Hills.

No word on whether Lauren Conrad has texted Heidi her congratulations yet. But if she happens to come to our celebrity gossip site and see these pics, she'll probably be too sick to her stomach to pick up her beloved Blackberry.

Spencer Pratt has promised to honor, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish a pair of fake boobs for as long as they both shall live.

And if Heidi Montag wants to stick around, too, so be it.

That's right, folks, everyone's least favorite couple is engaged. So, good news, Tameka Foster: you're no longer the most hated fiancee on the planet.

The Hills stars, whose controversial courtship was chronicled last season on the hit MTV reality series, have been dating for just eight months.

According to a source, Pratt purchased the diamond-encrusted platinum band with a pink stone on Monday at Ice at Brentwood Gardens before presenting Montag with a bended-knee proposal. An eyewitness at the store tells Us Magazine: "She was trying on tons of them and they looked really happy!"

Now the pair can plant rumors of a Lauren Conrad sex tape together through old age.

Pratt and Montag have been too busy preening for staged pictures to set a date, but we'll let you know as soon as one is announced. We don't know for sure if Audrina Patridge will be invited, but we can say this with certainty:

Francois-Henri Pinault is no longer the most well-known fiance within the world of celebrity gossip world. Sorry, man.

Presumably, like Laguna Beach graduate Talan Torriero and Nicole Scherzinger, Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag enjoy riding one another.

Apparently, though, they're enjoying another ride even more - the one that makes them household names despite their lack of redeeming qualities.

If you thought the bikini photos of her frolicking on the beach were cheesy, or if you thought his campaign to free Paris Hilton was the last you'd hear of him for awhile… you don't give Heidi Montag or Spencer Pratt enough credit.

Wearing matching turquoise tops, The Hills power couple was out for a day of fun and staged photos at the Santa Monica Pier Thursday. Spencer got a photographer to catch Heidi and himself in a completely spontaneous moment of fun once again. What are the odds? 

The looks on their faces say it all. Heidi Montag wants so badly to be an actress and look the part - blonde, beautiful, fun and oh-so-scared of a roller coaster's plunge! OMG! Yay!!

Spencer Pratt, meanwhile, is flat-out loving every second of his brief time in the spotlight and coming up with new PR schemes to get famous as we speak. He's so focused, he can't even open his eyes.

As for Heidi's new fake boobs? Well, they just aren't used to the rapid movements of a herky-jerky amusement park ride. They didn't sign up for this!

If you know anything about Spencer Pratt, you know he has never been one to shy away from a PR-generating, attention-grabbing scheme.

It's not surprising, then, that the dirtbag villain from The Hills has joined the lame Free Paris bandwagon with a "Free Paris" MySpace page.

The pseudo-celeb told told Us Weekly that when he's not frolicking on the beach in staged photos with plastic girlfriend Heidi Montag, he's been leading the fight to free Paris Hilton.

Just about anything makes for a better cause than that. Even convincing Heidi to get a boob job.

But Spencer Pratt is all about publicity.

"I've always thought the punishment should fit the crime," says the repulsive Spencer.

"[Paris Hilton] has changed her image dramatically over the last couple years. Now she's such a good role model and a smart businesswoman. So it's a shame that a miscommunication between her and her people is landing her in jail. She should get probation with community service, but no way should she be put in jail with real criminals."

Spencer Pratt claims that once 100,000 supporters sign his online petition he will take up the harlot's plight with Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa.

Good luck with that.

Speaking of people reinventing their image, Spencer Pratt is looking to go from a reputation as the slimy guy in the gold chains who masterminded Heidi ending her BFF-ship with Lauren Conrad to being only nutcase crazy enough to lend support to a slutty, spoiled DUI offender.

Terrific. Again, isn't there a better cause out there? Like freeing Sean Preston?

Frolicking in the surf.

Play-fighting. Making out.

Showing off her new boob job from every possible angle.

Clearly, in case you didn't know by now, Heidi Montag loves attention - and will go to great lengths to get it along with her boyfriend, Spencer Pratt.

A new batch of Heidi Montag pics have surfaced, and in them, she and Pratt act like they're having a great time on the beach - completely unbeknownst to anyone else, of course.

In reality, though, The Hills' most nauseating couple might as well have been standing there mugging for the damn camera.

Hell, Spencer Pratt probably paid some dude to show up and take these clearly-staged shots. Friggin' loser.

Would you put it past a guy who appeared in a Kevin Federline video?

We wouldn't. All we have to say is that we're glad some reality TV stars, such as Heidi's ex-BFF Lauren Conrad, don't resort to such annoying means to thrust themselves into the spotlight.

For more on the complete waste of oxygen that is Spencer Pratt, and to see more of his girlfriend's expensive new body, follow this link for more Heidi Montag bikini photos ...

At our weekly staff meeting this morning, the celebrity gossip writers at The Hollywood Gossip collectively decided that we don't ridicule Kevin Federline enough.

That may seem hard to believe, but since Britney Spears went bonkers, we've been forced to laud K-Fed's efforts as a father and focus on what a decent fellow he really is at heart.

But that doesn't mean we can't continue to mock his music "career." Anyone even remember when he was trying to be a rapper? His first performance told it all, it seems. Predictably, it was a short-lived venture. One replete with awful music.

We bring this up not only because K-Fed's entry into the music biz is unintentional comedy at its best, but because we've learned that the one and only Spencer Pratt (yes, the Devil himself) has a cameo in his music video for "Lose Control."

Here's the video for "Lose Control," as rapped by the self-proclaimed America's Most Hated. Laugh, enjoy, and look for Spencer Pratt - another guy America has come to love to hate (on The Hills) - around the 49-second mark.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atLJ2BxGIkE[/youtube]

Special thanks to RealityTVScoop.com for the tip about Spencer Pratt appearing in this masterful, legendary work of hip-hop art.

With the exception of a former colleague who defrauded its writing staff out of at least $20,000, there's no one that enrages The Hollywood Gossip more than Spencer Pratt.

Similar to Paris Hilton, the guy is famous almost strictly by association, boasting absolutely no redeeming qualities and contributing nothing to society, yet seemingly parlaying that into fame and a rather lucrative career.

It's the American way. One can at least give Spencer Pratt (pictured with girlfriend Heidi Montag) credit for exploiting his position and achieving a certain level of stardom. But how well do you really know the emerging star of MTV's The Hills?

He's one of the least sexy men alive, and one that Lauren Conrad undeniably hates. That's about all we've got.

But our celebrity gossip writers are inquiring minds here at T.H. Gossip, so we set out to discover more about him.

He was featured in the reality TV show The Princes of Malibu, which followed the Jenner kids (Brody Jenner and his brother, Brandon) as well as their bitch tag-along buddy, Spencer, as they... well, do nothing all day but bother David Foster and his superstar clients.

Follow the link to learn more about Spencer Pratt ...

The rumor that The Hills star Lauren Conrad and her ex-beau, Jason Wahler, filmed a secret sex tape that was to be released to the public took the celebrity gossip world by storm earlier this month.

It turns out there is no tape, and last week, we found an interview with LC's former BFF, Heidi Montag, and her obnoxious, ugly boyfriend, Spencer Pratt - both of whom Lauren Conrad believes are behind this.

This morning, Us Weekly has a new interview with Pratt and Montag, who further discuss their own relationship since Season 2 of The Hills concluded, as well the Lauren Conrad sex tape scandal.

Us: Heidi, Lauren said didn't contact her after news broke about the tape. Your take?

Heidi Montag: "It's astonishing that she would say that. I guess she forgot that I was in the hospital that week. Maybe that would explain why she didn't call to see how I was doing."

THG NOTE: Heidi Montag got a boob job and a nose job April 2.

Us: Spencer, did Lauren's split from Brody Jenner makes things tricky?

Spencer Pratt: "Lauren couldn't get into clubs before she met us! We were her ticket to Hollywood. As soon as the double dating stopped, she was out. She has trouble as third wheel, and that's what she was when Brody didn't want to keep seeing her."

Continue reading this interview with Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt ...

Yes, you read that right. Forget Matthew McConaughey, George Clooney and their annual battle for Sexiest Man Alive honors. This battle is for the complete opposite (dis)honor.

This list, compiled by the amazing Boston Phoenix, is chock full of irritating smirks, bad haircuts, possible murders and some seriously ugly mugs. Yup, the Phoenix list of The 100 Unsexiest Men Alive has it all, and we've got the highlights...

100. Tom Cruise. The heat that Tom Cruise emitted early in his career has long evaporated, leaving only a smirking corpse in its wake. Cruise struts around like a smaller, yappy version of Arnold Schwarzenegger as The Terminator, but comes off creepier, given his campaign to impregnate and wed enslave hot actresses.

92. Osama bin Laden. Here's a man that could use a makeover. Note to Osama: camouflage jackets have been out since the millennium. Sure, there's not a surplus of hip outlets â€" or even dry cleaners â€" in the caves of Afghanistan. But come on.

87. Joe Simpson. The former Baptist minister relentlessly pimps his daughters (Ashlee and what's-her-name) to MTV, John Mayer and Pete Wentz, then makes ourskin crawl by ogling his offspring's endowments. Gnarly.

79. Joe Francis. Skeezy creator of Girls Gone Wild stuck it to Paris Hilton and Tara Reid. If doing that disease-ridden duo wasn't enough to warrant his place on this list, he's headed to jail on contempt-of-court charges.

56. Kim Jong-Il. Besides an uncanny resemblance to Tom Cruise, the deranged North Korean demigod is a porn connoisseur, binge drinker and womanizer. Oh, and a mass murderer with nukes.

45. The Duke Lacrosse Team. You go to Duke. You play lacrosse. Yet your social life is so barren that you've got to rent a couple of cut-rate strippers? You dudes are guilty... of having no game whatsoever.

35. Kevin Federline. Would've placed even higher had Britney Spears not gone off the deep end and made FedEx look relatively stable by comparison.

33. Spencer Pratt. This obnoxious star of the MTV "documentary" series The Hills (left) has greasy hair, a veiny neck and forehead, circa 1994 gold chains and a cast-iron jaw. Yet he still manages to get Playboy playmates' numbers (while straight up playing Heidi Montag and making Lauren Conrad's life a living hell). Spencer Pratt, we loathe thee.

30. Howie Mandel. Few things are less sexy than obsessive-compulsive disorder and fear of touching others. That spells bad news for the freaky host of Deal or No Deal. No deal, Howie Mandel. No deal.

28. Dustin Diamond. Deviant, cretinous former child star who scammed his fans by selling shirts to help him avoid foreclosure â€" there were no such proceedings against him. Then there was the Dustin Diamond sex tape in which Screech gave two skanks the Dirty Sanchez.

27. Mr. Blackwell. His relevance is on life-support, but he nonetheless makes the news every year with his embarrassing list of the best- and worst-dressed celebrity fashion offenders.

25. O.J. Simpson. We're not even gonna go there.

23. Pete Doherty. "Heroin chic" is predicated on being able to do lots and lots of drugs without looking like a skid-row pin cushion. Somehow Pete Doherty (below) didn't get the memo. By association, he made coked-up gal-pal Kate Moss unsexy, too, for which men the world over will curse him forever.

20. Jared Fogle. Ubiquity and over-exposure has turned a merely annoying ex-fatty Subway pitchman into a serious pain in the ass.

18. Mel Gibson. Hateful director with massive alcohol problem.

11. Perez Hilton. Exponentially overhyped celebrity gossip blogger whose sense of entitlement far outweighs his contribution to society. Oh yeah, Perez Hilton is also gross.

7. Sanjaya Malakar. The class clown of American Idol is operating under the delusion that he's the class stud. Shyamali Malakar, on the other hand...

6. Don Imus. Long before Don Imus (below, left) got the ax for calling the Rutgers womens' basketball team a bunch of "nappy-headed hos," this talk-show troll established himself as one of the ugliest faces in an industry that prizes them.

3. Howard K. Stern. We understood the zillion-year-old billionaire: Anna Nicole Smith would sleep with anything for money. But her dalliance with this glassy-eyed salamander of a man (above, right) forced Americans to lower her standards: she'd screw anything with... kidneys? At least she was smart enough not to have a baby with him.

1. Donald Trump. It's not the greed, the preposterous comb-over, or the public bullying that turns us off any more: it's the pursed lips and the scrunched stare. Actually, scratch that: it's still the hair, the greed, and the bullying.