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The Hills' resident villain, Spencer Pratt, casts an evil glare at Harrison Ford as both whipped up Thanksgiving dinner as part of The Los Angeles Mission.

Just kidding. Even our man Spencer was too focused on an important cause to be scheming... at least at this moment. The L.A. Mission a non-profit organization serving the homeless people of the City of Angels. It's nice to see stars donating time and money to make the lives of the less fortunate a little brighter.

Fake Boobs on Display

Spencer Pratt, Harrison Ford and others serve up Thanksgiving dinner.

Other good news to come out of this? Spencer Pratt can write on his website that he was mentioned in the same breath as Harrison Ford! Now that's a first.

The legendary actor, 65, is set to reprise his role as the title character in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, which comes out in May 2008.

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Happy Thanksgiving from all of us here at The Hollywood Gossip. What would this traditional holiday be without family, friends, food, football and reflection upon some of the things we most appreciate in our lives.

For this celebrity news site, that means expressing thanks to some of the biggest turkeys we've come to know this past year. Below is a look at our staff's Top 10 (take a wild guess who was voted our Biggest Turkey of the Year) ...

Conservator and Daughter

10. Riley Giles. Not only does he give Lindsay Lohan a good stuffing, this clown is a meathead to the max. See mug shots. Yeah. Prime turkey material.

9. John Mayer. Makes the list in spite (or perhaps because) of the fact that he dates Minka Kelly. Guy's dome is also roughly the size of Plymouth Rock.

8. Michael Vick. Oh, wait, he's a dog.

7. Jan Adams. Worst. Doctor. Ever.

6. Brad Womack. Worst. Bachelor. Ever.

5. Dancing with the Stars judges. These losers really dropped the ball this season with some dubious decisions. Sabrina Bryan was robbed worse than Native Americans by the New World's European settlers. Close, anyway.

4. Spencer Pratt. The Hills villain sure can gobble up publicity.

3. Heather Mills. Imagine the kind of Thanksgiving feast you could throw after gold-digging your way to more than $50M of your ex-husband's fortune!

2. Blake Fielder-Civil. Raging alcoholism. Massive quantities of hard ass drugs. The surprise wedding. The bloody melee. A barroom brawl. Some witness tampering. This holiday, Amy Winehouse's husband should be thankful he's alive.

Fnally, The Hollywood Gossip's Biggest Turkey of the Year award goes to ...

1. Britney Spears. Talk about a foregone conclusion. Like the New England Patriots of the NFL, it was Britney Spears in her own league and everyone else playing for second. We raise a turkey leg (and some pork rinds) to you, Brit.

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As last night's episode of The Hills got underway, Spencer Pratt seethed as Heidi Montag dragged him to a church to discuss their upcoming wedding.

Miss Heidi found the perfect church ... at least in her opinion. Spencer seemed more uncomfortable - and like a bigger assbag - than ever before.

But more on that loser in a moment. Elsewhere in SoCal, Lauren Conrad hit the gym with BFFs, Whitney Port and Audrina Partridge. That's when Whitney got her game on and scored herself a date a guy: their trainer, Jarett!

THE HOLLYWOOD GOSSIP NOTE: Jarett is totally this guy!

Whitney and Jarett - who was trying way, way too hard on their date, but still seems like a decent fella - enjoyed a fun time. Although no kisses were doled out at the end, so Whit was left thinking there was more of a "friend vibe." Whatevs.

Whitney Port and Heidi Montag dominated last night's episode of The Hills.

Still, it was nice to get a glimpse into the love life of Whitney Port, a facet of The Hills that is rarely explored. She got out of a relationship this May. We've heard that Whit and E! Online's Ben Lyons are dating now, but this is not confirmed.

Meanwhile, Heidi comes home from work at Bolthouse Productions to find that Spencer has packed two suitcases. They're off to Vegas, Spencer announces ... for a wedding! This weekend! Heidi tweaks, Spencer squirms, they fight, she takes off that fake-ass $125 "engagement" ring and Spence walks out.

Of course, the next day, Spencer came crawling back with a dozen roses and said sorry, declaring to Heidi that "I want to marry you... I just get stressed out when I think of the big production when all I want to do is marry you."

It would almost be sweet if it weren't Spencer Pratt we're talking about.

Coming up next on The Hills... the she-Spencer. That's right, fans. Spencer Pratt has a younger sister! As Lauren puts it, "The only thing worse than Spencer is a she-version of Spencer." Should be a quality episode... as they all are.

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The villainous, revolting Spencer Pratt looked as classy as ever Thursday as he stopped by Wells Fargo Bank in Pacific Palisades, Calif., while running some errands with his plastic-looking "fiancee" Heidi Montag.

Apparently picking up a package was also on Spencer Pratt's agenda... and we're not talking about a trip UPS or FedEx here, people. We're talking about Spencer adjusting his miniscule manhood in public. Peep this pic:

Speidi Pic

Heidi Montag has Spencer Pratt by the balls... but they're still his.

Playing with sack aside, this pair of nuts was up to familiar old tricks on The Hills. We'll have a full recap for you later on today at The Hollywood Gossip.

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Remember when Lauren Conrad and Brody Jenner partied in Las Vegas on The Hills? Think about those good old days before peeping the pics below.

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt brought their sideshow red-hot love affair to Las Vegas over the weekend so that they could host a night of drunken revelry at Jet Nightclub at the Mirage Hotel and Casino Resort. And what a night it was.

Smokin' Speidi

Here are a few photos of Heidi and Spencer enjoying the ambiance of Las Vegas and then enjoying one another. A lot. Hot and heavy. On the dance floor...

Wow. If there is any pair pseudo D-list celebrities that could possibly make Las Vegas feel even seedier, it's Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt. It's a tough feat, but these two may have actually sullied the reputation of Sin City.

The fact that Heidi Montag takes an opportunity to drop down and rub that ass into Spencer's crotch whenever there is a camera within 100 feet just speaks to their level of class ... or lack thereof. Of course, it's not like we're going to stop attention to them or anything, so what can we say. So it goes. So it goes.

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In a twist that could only happen in the universe of The Hills, Spencer Pratt, long-accused of spreading rumors about a Lauren Conrad sex tape, now finds himself the subject of sex tape rumors ... involving himself.

A recent National Enquirer report claims Spencer Pratt is shopping footage of himself and some pals hooking up with a bevy of Brazilian women (before he met fiance Heidi Montag) and wants it released on the sly.

Inspecting the Chest

Specifically, under the guise that it had been "stolen." Hmm. That's quite the ruse... and the kind of thing we would certainly never put past Spencer Pratt.

Spencer and Heidi: A sex tape on the way?

Spencer tells Us: "I was never on camera. There is no sex tape. However, I did go to Brazil three years ago to film a jujitsu tournament for a documentary."

Yes, of course he did.

If a naked Spencer Pratt were to be found fornicating on film, this could be the next big scandal - perhaps even bigger than the Amy Fisher sex tape.

"Initial licensing could be upward of a million dollars," says an industry source who has bought and sold sex photos, pics of nude celebrities and video of stars doing the nasty. "He could easily turn it into a money-making machine."

More on the supposed Spencer sex tape if and when the story develops.

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What does a young, fun reality TV star do when she turns 21? Have a dinner with her lame "fiancé" packed with awkward pauses and boring conversation.

Yeah. Despite the best efforts of a sullen Heidi Montag to show The Hills viewers (as well as herself, in all likelihood) that a quiet dinner with Spencer Pratt was all she needed on such an occasion, Montag just can't sell this one.

She can fake her boobs, her nose, her engagement ring, her new Chanel purse (you know Spencer just got hold of a box and didn't pay for that thing), but even Heidi Montag fell short of convincing us that this was her idea of 21st birthday fun.

Whitney Port, Lauren Conrad

Luckily, not everyone is as dull as Heidi Montag, whose life less interesting than watching paint dry. Some girls from The Hills (Whitney/LC) actually do stuff!

Lauren Conrad and her Teen Vogue boss / co-worker, Whitney Port, put on a huge fashion show for the magazine, moving young Hollywood stars down the crowded red carpet and seating them in just minutes.

Despite widespread chaos and late-arriving stars such as Hayden Panettiere and Hilary Duff, LC and Whitney ran the event as well as any tandem could, and their efforts won the glowing approval of demanding supervising editor Lisa Love, as well as the magazine's editor-in-chief, Amy Astley. Team Whitney!

Meanwhile, at the famed Viper Room on Sunset Blvd., Audrina Patridge and her douchebag beau, Justin-Bobby, went to see a band called The Ruse perform.

She had planned on scouting them for Epic Records, where she works. But at an after-party, one of the band members starts scouting her, if you know what we mean. We mean he wants to get Audrina out of that oversized t-shirt!

Of course, a mumbling but semi-protective Justin-Bobby (a.k.a. Justin Brescia) tells the guy "she's pretty good" when asked if Audrina is on the market.

In moron-speak, this apparently means "hands off my woman," because the Ruse guy looks sad, and J-B and Audrina Patridge soon leave the bar together.

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In a surprising twist, this week's episode of The Hills focused almost entirely on LC and Whitney's jobs and responsibilities at Teen Vogue, and did not feature Heidi Montag on screen for a second. Episode of the year nominee, anyone?

With the all-important Fashion Week right around the corner, Whitney Port and Lauren Conrad were sent New York City by their boss, Lisa Love, to discuss the party-planning for a magazine bash at Teen Vogue's Manhattan HQ.

Upon arriving in the Big Apple, Whitney Port learns she will be all alone giving the big presentation to the management team - Team Whitney! - while LC is sent off to assist at a Marc Jacobs model casting session across town.

In front of the Teen Vogue brain trust, Whitney Port is sweating bullets in her hot dress (which raises eyebrows) as she attempts to explain her plan for the big bash to the executives, who keep throwing her harder questions she wasn't planning on! Whitney holds her own, but it's tough out there in the corporate world.

But our girl pulls through, and upon reuniting with Lauren at the hotel, learns that Lauren met Marc Jacobs himself. Like, OMG. Perhaps more impressively, she left the event without getting any guys' numbers, unlike the previous model casting event (during which she met a young fellow named Gavin Beasley).

Meanwhile, back in SoCal, Frankie Delgado tells Spencer Pratt to stop being such a little bitch (our words, not his) and call Brody Jenner to end their dude feud.

It turns out Spencer does call, but it's Brody Jenner who wants nothing to do with him. LC tells Brody how she doesn't want to be responsible for the boys' break-up, but Brody assures her it's his decision not to patch things up with Spencer. Nice.

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We dislike the nickname Speidi for Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag, but when the biggest tool in Hollywood goes out and physically dresses up as Spider-Man, well, we have no choice but to run with it. You gotta love Halloween.

Heidi Montag and "fiance" Spencer Pratt made their way to a friend's (yes, they have one) Halloween party near Santa Monica Sunday, dressed in full costume.

Heidi went as The Little Mermaid (oddly conservative - since when does this girl turn down an easy opportunity for bikini photos to show off those huge breasts), while Spencer donned a Spider-Man outfit. Tobey Maguire better watch out!

Speidi (Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag): Horrific Halloween happiness.

We've gotta hand it to them on this, though. When asked whose Halloween party they were going to, the couple jokingly replied, 'Britney Spears.'"

We can't imagine the "treats" handed out at that party. Snickers and crystal meth for all! Anyway, happy Heidi-ween! Click here for more pics of Heidi and Spencer.

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As we reported back on October 11, there is evidence in recent photos of The Hills that prove the "reality" show is a sham. And we're not just talking about Heidi Montag's plastic surgery-enhanced rack (or her engagement ring).

No, her relationship with Spencer Pratt (and singing career and apartment and job) aren't the only fake things on the hit reality show. The show is fake in and of itself. A stunning revelation here at The Hollywood Gossip.

So great is the evidence that a rep for MTV was forced to comment on photos of Heidi and Spencer at LAX... where he drops her off to go see her folks, then picks her up... a few minutes and one outfit change later! Smooth, guys.

Heidi and Spencer at LAX

Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag: A joyful, entirely bogus reunion.

BUSTED! While there's no denying it, MTV issued a statement that "This was a pickup shot for continuity that in no way affected the story line."

While this may be more or less true, they could do a better job hiding obvious fakery such as this. Or Lauren Conrad's changing fingernail colors. Or Spencer's mysterious disappearing, reappearing facial hair. What a douche.

In closing, all we have to say is ... Team Whitney Port!