by Free Britney at . Comments

Sunday on Kourtney & Kim Take New York, Kim Kardashian finally has hubs Kris Humphries living with her in the city ... but decides she has more fun when he's not.

Foreshadowing, anyone?

Kim, Kourtney and Mason drove on up Connecticut to "escape the paparazzi," leaving Scott Disick and Kris to their own scripted devices. How did that play out?

Find out in our weekly rekap, THG style!

Scott Disick, Kris Humphries

Kim and Kourt checking out Mystic, Conn., aquarium with Mason. Nice place. Plus 20.

Kris has been offered "some quick cash" to head up to Toronto and make a club appearance, so off he goes. Kim would be so proud/jealous. Plus 15.

Scott decides to join, saying, "I may go just to prove a point that I'm not whipped." Dude, the same girl let you knock her up twice with no ring. You're good. Plus 25.

"I may go just to prove a point that I'm not whipped," Scott warns Kris, who's having his photo taken with lots of girls ... on a REALITY SHOW. Minus 50.

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by Free Britney at . Comments

Sunday on Kourtney & Kim Take New York, Kourt went kouponing, Scott bought a piano and Kris was on a quest to uncover Jonathan Cheban's sexual orientation. 

Yes, with a cast as interesting as drywall, they had to bring in this klown.

The story editors and writers are getting creative, though. Give 'em that.

Is Scott serious about his baby grand? Did Kourt save big bucks? What was the final verdict on Jonathan? Does anyone care? Here's our weekly rekap, THG style!

Kim Kardashian and Jonathan Cheban

Scott and friend Chris (not Kris) take a walk and see a fabulous $1.5 million grand piano in a storefront. Wait ... they're serious? Scott has friends still? Plus 10!

Disick goes with the baby grand instead. Recession and all. Plus 12.

As Scott flaunts wealth, Kourtney discovers the couponing craze! See what the writers are doing here, playing up the “opposites attract” angle?! Fail. Minus 35.

Kim and Kris double date with Simon Huck and his boyfriend. Then Huck's business partner and Kim's BFF Jonathan Cheban shows up, alone. Mysterious!! Plus 7.

Kris says it's obvious that Jonathan is a homosexual individual. He then proceeds to ask him about it point blank in a store. Wow, Kris. Awkward much? Minus 20.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Oh, happy days. The holidays can finally begin!

Early this morning, Kim Kardashian and kompany released the family's official Christmas card, with each member getting his or her black tie on and Kim, naturally, standing all alone.

If you listen closely enough, you can almost hear the publicist-inspired whining coming out of her mouth...

2011 Kardashian Christmas Card

The photo was snapped by Nick Saglimbeni and there’s a apparently a 3D version available for those that purchase 3D glasses. On a related note: if you purchase 3D glasses to view to view the Kardashian Christmas card, don't stop driving at the store. Just keep right on going to a psychologist's office.

Tell this professional it's an emergency. You clearly need major help.

[Photo: Kim Kardashian Blog]

by Free Britney at . Comments

Sunday on Kourtney & Kim Take New York, Kim's Spin Crowd BFF Jonathan Cheban is (supposedly) planning to sell her out with write a tell-all book about her life.

Meanwhile, Kris Humphries decides to throw a party and invite random girls while the Kardashian sisters are out of town, and Scott Disick dabbles in Judaism.

At least the story editors and writers thought up some new angles this week.

What did Kris say about the big party? Is Scott serious? Was Jonathan really planning to blindside Kim? THG breaks down Sunday evening's drama, +/- style:

  • Jonathan Cheban Pic
  • Kim Kardashian in InStyle Australia

Kris Jenner tells Kim about Cheban's scheme to shop a tell-all about her. She's, like, devastated. Naturally, she found out from her mother of all people. Plus 5.

Kim worries that Jonathan is using her like everyone else. Kim, you use everybody else to make millions. 'Memba the wedding? It's a vicious circle. Minus 23.

Maturely, Kim starts a Twitter war with Cheban. Plus 6, as that may be how Kim Kardashian, or at least her professional Tweet writer, actually settles konflict.

Wouldn't you know it, Kim learns it's not a tell-all, but a guide to becoming an "it girl" using her as an example. NOW she feels BAD! Good one, E! Minus 71.

Jonathan hangs up on her after her attempt to apologize. Plus 15.

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by Free Britney at . Comments

Sunday on Kourtney & Kim Take New York, newlyweds Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries continued to butt heads, while butt head Scott Disick's risque computer search history ruffled some feathers with baby mama Kourtney.

Scripted, contrived nonsense alert!

What did Kris say to Kim that really hit klose to home? Why did Kourt decide she needs to spice things up? THG breaks down Sunday evening's drama, +/- style:

Kim K. Image

Kim kicks off the third episode of the season pretending to contemplate family. "Maybe it's time to get off the pill and see what happens naturally," she says, seemingly without irony, seeing as there is nothing original about this girl. Minus 9.

Kourtney thinks it'd be Mason to have a playmate. Of course, she knows Kim will never really oblige so she went and got pregnant again herself. Proactive. Plus 17.

Kris: "We can have our own cuter version of Mason." Unlikely. He's a doll! Plus 6.

Momager Kris Jenner of all people makes the valid point that they shouldn't even think about this because don't even know where they're going to live. Plus 8.

Speaking of which: Kris really wants to settle in Minnesota, to which Kim replies, "How am I going to have my career and live in Minnesota?" Minus 25 for Kim being so shallow ... and Kris actually thinking this might happen in his lifetime.

Humphries' rationale on that front: "By the time you have kids and they're in school, no one will probably care about you, let's be honest." LOLOLOL. Plus 270.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Note to Farrah Abraham: stick to being a bad teen mom. Because you make a really awful Twitter combatant.

Over the weekend, this MTV reality star randomly got into a war of online words with Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick, taking the couple to task for having a second baby out of wedlock and comparing their situation to that of various single parents on Teen Mom... nevermind Kourtney and Scott's age, stable relationship and financial well-being.

Now, in light of the backlash against her critique - seriously, Farrah, it takes A LOT to force people on to the side of the Kardashians. Well done! - Abraham has Tweeted a defense of her viewpoint, writing:

4 all who misunderstood: regards to kourtney K.~ I hope she takes her relationship w/her boyfriend more serious 4 their children-takecare.

Okay. Whatever. Case closed, right? Not quite.

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by Free Britney at . Comments

The second, scripted episode of Kourtney & Kim Take New York aired last night on E!, and was most notable for the return of Khloe Kardashian, sage relationship kounselor.

It's all relative, of course, and kompared to Kim's bull$h!t marriage to Kris Humphries, and Kourt's ongoing problems with that douche Scott Disick, Khloe comes off like roses.

What advice did the visiting sister have for her siblings? THG breaks down Sunday evening's drama plus-minus style as we look for more signs of Kim's 72-day flame out:

Kourtney and Kim Take New York Cast

That didn't take long. Learning that Kim and Kris haven't even lived together, she tells her to go to Minnesota to visit him. Good advice, even if it was a lost cause. Plus 10.

Khloe tells Kourt to dump Scott if the feelings aren't there. Normally, a no-brainer, but she gets a lot of mileage out of him getting her pregnant every few years. Wash.

Kourtney heads to Scott's parents' house in the Hamptons, not knowing if Scott is even gonna show up. We imagine the giant camera crew following him knows. Minus 15.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Thanks a lot, Farrah Abraham. You've forced us to take the side of the Kardashians.

Earlier today, the former Teen Mom star randomly Tweeted her reaction to Kourtney Kardashian's second pregnancy, writing: Im shocked Kourtney Kardashian is pregnant again, Did she not learn anything from TEEN MOM? Maybe its a fake pregnancy, like kims wedding SAD.

  • Farrah Abraham Ditches Daughter
  • Kourtney Kardashian Pregnant Cover

Kourtney, in response, pointed out one of the major differences between her situation and that of Farrah and her MTV co-stars, Tweeting "I'm 32 years old! I may look young, honey, but don't get it twisted."

Kardashian, of course, is also a multi-millionaire with a large support system... and that's before you consider E! producers!

Scott Disick also jumped in to this Tweet-off, referring to Abraham as "some s-it stain" and echoing his girlfriend's stance: "We're not teenagers, ya f-cking moron."

But Farrah was not to be denied! She concluded her rant with: "Guess what! Age and money honestly do not change a person's poor choice. Quit making excuses."

It's pretty difficult, but try to choose a side in this asinine feud:

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian may be destined to never procreate, but she's about to become an aunt for the second time.

Kourtney Kardashian announced today - via a statement to E! News and an Us Weekly cover story, of course: cha-ching! - that she and Scott Disick will soon be parents again.

"Scott and I are so excited to announce that we are expecting our second child and are thrilled to be expanding the love in our family," she said, adding that she's nine weeks along and, yes, one is supposed to wait until one is 12 weeks along to tell the public, but: "I'm confident."

Kourtney Kardashian Pregnant Cover

And here's an incredible coincidence: the pregnancy takes place just as the oldest Kardashian sibling is kicking off an E! Online-sponsored Web series titled Kourtney's Mommy Blog. Look for her to share stories on there about Mason, while offering parenting and fashion advice to other mothers, who apparently have absolutely nowhere else to go.

Welcome to the Kardashian world, unborn baby. Your mom is already making money off of you.

[Photo: WENN.com]

by Free Britney at . Comments

Kristin Cavallari did not. Have. Sexual. Relations with that douchebag.

The former Hills star and Dancing With the Stars contestant says a tabloid report linking her to Kourtney Kardashian's boyfriend is inaccurate and defamatory.

A Life & Style story suggested that Cavallari had an affair with Disick, who has been in a committed relationship with Kardashian since 2007, back in 2009.

Moreover, it implied that because of said fling, Scott was "not allowed" on the set of Dancing With the Stars, where Kourt's been cheering on brother Rob.

  • Well Hung
  • Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari Picture

"It's 100 percent not true," Cavallari said on The Billy Bush Show, adding that her current love, NFL star Jay Cutler, "didn't believe [the report] for a second."

Cavallari said she was upset that Disick and the Kardashian family didn't deny the tabloid story outright. Umm, the Kardashians? Turn down publicity? Never.

"I just think, what convenient timing for them," she said.

"With their show premiering next week. With everything that's going on for Kim, I feel like they're trying to take the heat off her. When there's a story like that, they always call you, asking if you want to comment and clearly none of them denied it."

"It's disrespectful to me and Jay," Kristin Cavallari added, clearly far from pleased about the situation, "and I think it just says a lot about their character."

Pretty much hit the nail on the head there, KC.