Sammi Giancola Jersey Shore

Those hoping for major fireworks or knock-down, drag-out brawls on the Jersey Shore Season 2 reunion special last night came away sorely disappointed.

On some reality shows, the reunion special is the best part. It's when Teresa Giudice flips tables and labels Danielle Staub a prostitution whores. Not here.

These people are all flirting with prostitution whore status, too. Anyway, here's THG's usual +/- recap of last night. Aww yeah, reunion show recap YEAH!!

There's no love lost between Ron and JWoww after The Note.

One could argue this show is depressing, and that its cast is a bunch of losers who reflect badly on our society. Or one could say It's T-shirt tiiiiiime!! Plus 7.

Could host Julissa Bermudez be more robotic? They should have gotten Angelina Pivarnick to host without the cast knowing. We'd pay to see that. Minus 5.

Speaking of Ange, Ronnie had one of the best Jersey Shore quotes last night: "How could you not smush if you get Fossil watch? And it was white!" Plus 9.

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After some skirmishes but a lack of fireworks, the second season of Jersey Shore went out with a thud. Not really a bang. Pauly D didn't even try to get it in!

There was a trip to the swamp, a feud between friends, a last hurrah at the club, and a great line or two, but "Back Into the Fold" was more filler than finale.

Below, THG breaks down the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's Season 2 finale in its patented +/- recap. Aww yeah, last recap YEAH!!

They really dragged this season of Jersey Shore out.

The gang heads to the Everglades. MTV is really milking the Florida thing. Minus 5.

Sitch scares JWoww with his frog legs. We mean actual dismembered frog parts, not his own legs, which are frog-like compared to that HGH-enhanced chest. Plus 4.

The restroom tryst starring the Situation during the last night at the club might have set the sanitary bar lower than ever. Not a small feat for Jersey Shore. Minus 6.

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Last night's Jersey Shore was titled "Deja Vu All Over Again." Fitting, as the plight of Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino continued for a second straight week.

After the self-proclaimed King of Pimps ran afoul of Snooki last week, he struck out with more girls, got the gang booted from da club and failed as a wingman.

We felt bad ... for Pauly D. Below, THG breaks down the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's episode of the show in its patented +/- recap ...

Not DTF? Then GTF out!

Snooki becomes homesick after saying goodbye to her friend Ryder and contemplates leaving. Minus 7, because we know filming ends in a matter of days.

The Situation kicks a girl out of his bed after she tells him she doesn't want to hook up, leading to one of our favorite exchanges this season. Sitch: "Don't come over to somebody's house at f*%king 5 a.m. and expect to play checkers." Non-DTF Girl: "I never said anything about checkers, OLD MAN!" LOL. Guy is like 28. Plus 28.

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Ronnie Ortiz-Magro has it all figured out.

The Jersey Shore star was caught cheating multiple times on girlfriend Sammi Giancola during Season 2 in Miami, but he knows that as long as he apologizes and says how atrocious his behavior was, her pathetic ass will take him back.

Done and done.

SELF RESPECT: "Sweetheart" Sammi Giancola has none.

"When I saw myself with those girls [it] was, 'Wow, you're the man right now at the club. You look f*%king awesome,'" he says of his wild Jersey Shore days.

But, then he adds: "And then when I go home to Sam, I'm like, 'Wow, I'm embarrassed. I'm ashamed of myself. I'm embarrassed about what I did to her.'"

Sure you are, man. Just stick to the script.

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We love us some Jersey Shore, but this week let us down a little.

Last week's epic throwdown would have been a fitting end to the South Beach venture, wrapping up the sophomore season of the MTV hit at an even 10 episodes.

After that scintillating drama, this week felt like filler.

Still, THG's here as always to break down the best Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's installment of the show in its patented +/- recap below ...

Ronnie and Sammi scenes make for a Jersey Snore.

Angelina Pivarnick is gone, and we have to give that a Minus 15. Painful as she can be at times, that spark, that common enemy, was sorely lacking Thursday. Sigh.

JWoww: "I like my boobs." Money does buy nice things. Plus 4.

Totally random, but Plus 13 for last night's Bones. Follow the link to see why. If The Situation actually guest starred like they wanted, we might score it even higher.

Wanting to save a lobster, Snooki and JWoww thought lobsters ate insects and put it in a bowl of fresh water. Public schools, you get an EPIC FAIL. And a Minus 12.

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Oh, Angeliner. We're sort of going to miss you.

The second-grade grammar, the lack of personal hygiene, the drama. The house won't be the same, even if it's better off without this classy Staten Island product.

Following many near-fights and one epic throwdown, Angelina Pivarnick bid farewell to Jersey Shore for the second straight year. Like we said, for the best.

As always, THG's here to break down all the best Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's installment of the show in its patented +/- recap below ...

Angelina Pivarnick summed up in a single image.

Angelina Pivarnick deserves a Plus 10 right off the bat for getting every single cast member - most of whom are genuinely nice people despite their trashy antics - to despise her. A rare feat. Drama sometimes happens, but this girl just creates it.

"I think Angelina loves my sloppy seconds," Snooki stated. "She goes to Vinny and she's trying to go to what's-his-name. Like, what are you doing? If you wanna make out with me, just ask. I will say yes." Gross, really? Minus 8.

Pauly D is seriously wifing up his Cuban girl! Plus 5.

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Silly us. We will never again doubt Jersey Shore's ability to lower the bar. Just when you think it cannot get more tasteless or hilarious, you are proven wrong.

Not one week goes by that we, as viewers, aren't introduced to fist fights, terrible grammar, pseudonyms for bodily functions and thoroughly revolting situations.

As always, THG's here to break down all the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's installment of the show in its patented +/- recap below ...

JWoww and her Guido Du Jour have it out.

Plus 9 for the stomach-churning double entendre of the episode title, "Dirty Pad."

JWoww and her man solve arguments by picking each other’s noses. Minus 2.

Angelina, Ron and Sam take Jose out for his birthday. Ron: "Jose is definitely getting played. (pause) Like a piano. He's getting cheated on by a dirty piano." Plus 11.

Angelina takes Jose into the Smush Room but refuses to hook up with him. Minus 3. Then she lies about hooking up with him in the Smush Room. Minus 4 more.

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Despite Ronnie Ortiz-Magro being the worst boyfriend in human history, Sammi "Sweetheart" Giancola simply cannot let the Jersey Shore meathead go.

She's said "I'm DONE" so many times it's become a favorite drinking game of ours, but clearly isn't really. It's like he's trying to get dumped and can't.

He's not even sorry for creepin' all over South Beach in Season Two and blatantly hooking up with so many girls behind his on-and-off girlfriend's back.

BACK ON: At least until close of business today.

"I regret getting caught," he said on MTV's after-show. "I don't regret having a good time. I regret getting into bed with Sammi after I got home."

"That was my downside."

Giancola says Ron was "sickening" and "disgusting," but didn't want to believe it when JWoww and Snooki slipped her a note detailing his wild ways.

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"I don't even know. Who knows, dog. That's the first time. That's the first time that has happened. But I'm a trooper! I'm The Situation, man!" - The Situation

What was Mike referring to in one of our favorite Jersey Shore quotes from last night? Hooking up with a chick at the club that was probably a dude, of course.

These things happen down at the shore. What else happened on Thursday's episode? Let's find out in THG's exclusive point-system recap of "Not So Shore" ...

The Situation works his game. With a man.

After hooking up with Vinny, Snooki says it was like "putting a watermelon in a pinhole." Umm. Minus 12 for the imagery of a watermelon and Snooki's pinhole.

Vinny likely contracts pink eye (again). Pauly D's diagnosis: "Your eyebrows are so bushy, they collect so much more bacteria than normal eyes would." Plus 9.

Speaking of Pauly D, dude got so freaking hammered he had to be helped into bed. Who does this guy think he is, Ronnie? Wash, because we still love Pauly.

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"I'm definitely not a saint. If I walked into a church, I'd probably burst into flames to be honest with you ... But I think that I can probably talk my way out of the hole I dug. I mean, how deep is a grave?" - Ronnie Magro

The great thing about this line, one of many great Jersey Shore quotes from last night's episode, is that Ron probably really believed it. Sammi is that pathetic.

Did he succeed? Let's find out in THG's Jersey Shore point-system recap ...

The Situation works his game during an MVP night.

During Gay Pride Week in Miami, JWoww and Snooki were down to celebrate: "Gay Pride, yay!" exclaimed Snooki. Plus 2 for not seriously offending anyone there!

After defending her evening out by saying those guys are not attracted to vagina, Snook dispatched Emilio Masella for good. JWoww clapped, as did we. Plus 7.

The Situation brings home two girls, but had invited two others over earlier. Now it's a 4-on-3 Situation in this MVP night ... with one grenade! Boom! Minus 5.

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