by Free Britney at . Comments

Last week, Jersey Shore focused on the aftermath of Mike getting his ass kicked by a wall, and on Snooki's ongoing relationship issues with Jionni.

Amazingly, it was Ron who helped both his co-stars work through their issues. Elsewhere, Pauly and Vinny introduced us to the glory that is FPC.

Now that everything is back to normal (sort of), the gang reverted to vintage skanky, drunken, hilarious form at the (Italian) shore last night.

As always, we break down all of the top Jersey Shore quotes and moments for you as we recap Thursday's gripping installment, THG +/- style!

Deena and Snooki Kissing

The roommates/producers decide to take a weekend trip to visit the beaches in Riccione. How on earth did they ever get time off from "work"?? Minus 4.

"It looks like Hawaii, so it's like an island, or maybe on a border of a continent, you know what I mean, so it's like by ocean." - Effing Snooki. Minus 11.

So many suitcases, so few days, so little room atop Italian cars. Plus 2.

The guys met Mike's Italian "twin." Now THERE'S a situation! Plus 2.

At least he's neck brace-free now. Although that was hilarious. Wash.

The girls proceeded to get sloshed and learn how to say vagina in Italian. Plus 3, because that body part was certainly on the minds of two of them.

Continue Reading...

by Free Britney at . Comments

Fist-pump. Pushups. Chapstick.

We were wondering how Jersey Shore would follow up the most recent episode, in which a wall KO'd The Situation, and well, there you have it.

While not exactly as catchy as GTL, FPC does have a ring to it. Luckily, there were more fist-pumps than actual fists thrown this week, as well.

As always, we recapped all the top Jersey Shore quotes and moments for you. Let's break down last night's gripping installment, THG +/- style!

Gonna Fist-Pump 'Til Our F--kin' Arms Fall Off!

Mike throws a pity party for himself. Only he attends. Minus 5.

Ronnie, of all people, decided to have a one-on-one with Mike, letting him know that he was there for him and that he could open up to him. Sniff. Plus 9.

Snooki argues with Jionni, who doesn't like to hear risque stuff or about her drinking. This from a man who is willingly dating EFFING SNOOKI. Minus 17.

Mr. Therapist Ron tells her to just be herself and that she can't change for a guy. He should talk, but Plus 6 because he's still right and being hella nice.

Continue Reading...

by Free Britney at . Comments

Ronnie and Mike's epic throwdown on Jersey Shore picked up last night in a special Sunday episode before the Video Music Awards. So who won the big fight?

We're gonna say the wall by TKO.

In typical Jersey Shore fashion, the events had to be seen to be believed, and the fallout was uglier than the altercation itself. Never a dull moment ...

As always, we've recapped all the top Jersey Shore quotes and moments for you. Let's break last night's episode, "And The Wall Won," THG +/- style!

Jersey Shore Cast Season 4 Pic

Not wasting any time, we pick up right where we left off, and the violence ensued when Ron's pent-up anger toward Mike could not be contained. Well, Sitch's head got rammed into the wall ... by Sitch. Seriously. Minus 20.

There's no attempting to explain that one. Vinny, Pauly D, Jenni and Snooki look on half-worried, but mostly just disgusted or stunned. It's hard to say. Plus 5.

Security eventually breaks it up. Plus 4 for saving Sitch and all, but Minus 4 because since when do they intervene when cast members beats on themselves?

Continue Reading...

by Free Britney at . Comments

Antics such as Deena's bi-curious robbery are almost par for the course on Jersey Shore. The kind of pent-up rage we saw last night, however? Off the chain!

It was one of the most-hyped events of the entire fourth season, and the culmination of the rage between Ronnie and Mike actually lived up to expectations.

Somewhat disturbingly, but it lived up to it.

As always, we've recapped all the top Jersey Shore quotes and moments for you. Let's break last night's episode, "Crime and Punishment," THG +/- style!

Drinking on the Job

Comcast episode description: "Ronnie and Sammi return to their old ways." Shiver. Minus 6. Special episode airing Sunday night before the VMAs? Plus 10!

Snooki shut off communication with Mike, saying their "bridge is burned," then took Ron's advice and told Jionni. We think they're good ... for now. Plus 4.

Vinny told the guys that Deena c*ck-blocked him, but that's not entirely true, as Erica didn't really smush Deena and ended up in Vin's bed later, so Minus 5.

There's a difference between a "tag-team" and a "tag-rob." Who knew. Plus 3.

Continue Reading...

by Free Britney at . Comments

Is Deena Nicole Cortese actually bisexual, or just putting on a show for MTV cameras? Unclear. Did she just pull a robbery on Sitch and Vinny? Quite clear!

That was not a Jersey Shore plot line we saw coming. The exposing of Sitch and Snook's smush session and the Ron-Sam reconciliation, however, felt inevitable.

As always, we've recapped all the top Jersey Shore quotes and moments for you below. Let's break last night's episode, "Twinning," THG +/- style!

Deena Girl-on-Girl Action

Snooki wants to grab a glass of wine with Ron before GTL. Lush. Minus 4.

He plans to have "the conversation" with Sam soon, he says. We're already feeling a bit scared, emotionally drained, and excited for the fireworks. Plus 5.

Snook feels Luigi's "weiner" at the gym. He nods and laughs, since he doesn't understand. Or maybe he does, which would be even funnier. Plus 3.

Deena is gettin' some Lean Cuisine. NOTE: Not the frozen dinner. Minus 2.

Continue Reading...

by Free Britney at . Comments

Single Ronnie made a return to Jersey Shore last night, while Pauly and Deena channeled Season 3 Snooki and Vinny with their potential, awkward "romance."

As for Season 4 Snooki, she was having issues with Jionni, and guess who was there to help her through them? This Situation? Not a good situation.

The second episode of the season offered plenty of amusing Jersey Shore quotes, as always, but the major drama of the summer is still to come.

Let's break down the second episode of the summer, THG +/- style!

Pauly and Deena

Minus 5 for the immediate continuation of the "romantic" scene with Pauly and Deena that was in our heads for days after the Season 4 premiere.

Ronnie is on the phone with a girl. Not named Sam. Or his mom! Her name's Hannah, and she's been "helping him get through some stuff." Stuff, he says ... It has a name, you know. A nickname, even: S-W-E-E-T-H-E-A-R-T. Plus 7.

Deena takes a spill as they return home. So predictable. Minus 4.

Pauly totes pretends to be passed out so he doesn't have to hit it or be forced to express overtly that he doesn't wish to hit it. Classic move. Plus 8.

Continue Reading...

by Free Britney at . Comments

Jersey Shore fans know Ronnie and Sammi's relationship is volatile to say the least. This fact isn't lost on their fellow cast members, either.

In a preview from tonight's episode, Vinny Guadagnino takes Sammi Giancola to task for her erratic behavior around Ronne Ortiz-Magro.

"I'm done with him and you being drunk," Vinny tells her.

"When Ronnie and Sammi are drunk, they turn into different people and there's no getting through to them," he later reasons in the clip.

Fed-up roommates Deena Nicole Cortese and Jenni "JWoww" Farley agree.

"This needs to stop! You're not in high school and you need to grow up and find a happy medium," JWoww says of the recurring spats.

Giancola, naturally, reacts in non-Sweetheart fashion.

Continue Reading...

by Free Britney at . Comments

Taking the MTV phenomenon they've created abroad, the cast members of Jersey Shore certainly didn't waste time getting down to business in Italy.

As the description on our Comcast digital guide put it, "violence," "intensely sexual situations" and "intensely suggestive dialogue" were prevalent.

While the season premiere didn't quite live up to the hype, it did set up a couple of key story arcs and offer plenty of amusing Jersey Shore quotes.

Let's break down the fourth season opener, THG +/- style!

Boning Up

Snooki shows off a pair of I Heart Vinny underwear as she packs. Plus 4.

"No granatos." - Vinny, boning up on his Italian and simultaneously conveying what he will not be boning in Italia. Allegedly. Amazing. Plus 9.

"I'll bring guys home, but I won't do sex." - Deena. Lie. Minus 6.

Uncle Nino said something ... well, it was authentic. Plus 8, because we really hope to see more of this guy. Same goes for Single Ronnie.

Continue Reading...

by Free Britney at . Comments

Just when you thought you'd seen everything.

Ronnie Ortiz-Magro and Sammi "Sweetheart" Giancola from Jersey Shore celebrated their final few days in Italy with a night out at 21 club last weekend.

However, rather than end their trip with one last blowout, the group left after a few hours and headed home, arriving back at their pad happy as clams.

With another pay raise secured for season five, RonSam and their cohorts have a lot to smile about. But still, when's the last time you saw pics like this?!

  • Sammi Giancola and Ronnie Magro Photo
  • Sammi Giancola, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro

Approximately five minutes after these jovial photos were taken, death threats were exchanged and the cops were called. Just kidding ... well, probably.

[Photos: WENN.com]

by Free Britney at . Comments

Wherever the Jersey Shore crew goes, trouble is sure to follow.

Case in point? Deena Cortese deciding to climb over a bridge in Florence and almost falling into the River Arno WAY down below. Fortunately (or not, depending on your point of view), Sammi Giancola grabbed on to her for dear life.

Deena survived her journey on the stone structure in one piece:

  • Jump, Deena! Jump!
  • Deena and Sam in Italy

Despite being booed by locals and banned from drinking in the street by the Mayor of Florence, it seems the gang are still intent on behaving badly.

Earlier in the day Deena, nicknamed "The Blaster" for reasons unknown, was seen admiring Michelangelo's statue of David. But not how you think.

She wasn't gazing at the jaw-dropping marble statue, but a nude, crude novelty apron which captivated her attention. Class in a glass, baby!

The whole cast of the MTV show arrived in Florence earlier this month to film season four. Sadly, they'll probably return to the U.S. after that.

[Photos: WENN.com]